everyday i yearn to love you more...

2009-12-30T04:57:00.000-08:00

hey guys! i am back into business. i feel so dumb! its like a few months i have stopped blogging, just been very amazed by some people and their rate of growth. its amazing. sometimes i cant help but feel insecure or jealous that they are doing so great, but i gotta let go of emotions into God's hands. i gotta start controlling who i am. outside i may seem like a super nice guy, but deep inside i can be really like a monster. i was ashamed and hated myself for thinking thoughts that i dont want to think, letting my thoughts get out and loose, thats how i just lost control of everything. sometimes i keep feeling that God doesnt love me anymore, God doesnt care about me anymore, but thats not true. God has proved to me His love, twice through the bible. about Zion, about Ephraim.

Zion and Ephraim are two cities that has went against God. but God mentioned that no matter what happens, God still loves them, God still etched their names on the palm of his hands, telling them that God's heart still have them.

God of Ephriam, God of Zion.

Be glorified.

2009-11-22T05:00:00.000-08:00

i am creating a new blog, yet i dont bother to update mine!! hahaha. maybe i will focus my posts on tumblr for F6 ba, but this com is super slow. haha.

2009-10-27T01:55:00.000-07:00

hey guys, a long time since i blogged. i just feel this urge, to say something long, yet i know that no one would have that much time to listen to this.. hhaa.
i feel sad.
sad, not for myself, but for the sheeps that are following God.some people gets saved, excited for God, and love God till they are willing to go to the end of the earth, yet not long later, they tell themselves God is not real and they leave Him.
what do people treat God for?
i just feel quite angry for God, that many people has been touched by His love, and experienced countless blessings and breakthroughs with Him, yet in the end they curse God and leave Him. what do they take God for?
my God is a merciful one, bless Him.
i wont deny that i have thoughts of backsliding.
but i am still standing strong here, though sometimes i struggle, i struggle with all my might and faith to keep myself alive in Him. life is like this, we HAVE to struggle at times!
sometimes, its just really encounters that shows you how much you love Him and love people.
last saturday, i nearly had twice of a car accident, i shall not elaborate further, but this though ran across my head : if i am not there anymore, lesser lives willl be saved and touched by God. i dont want that.
i refuse to die until i get as many lives saved. i know one day God is going to call me up. i will accept it, but i shall look forward. the legacy and foundations i have laid will be kept on by the future generation.
how many times i had failed.
yet He still tells me.
"See, i have this day set you over the nations, and over the kingdoms, to root out and to pull down, to destroy and to pull down, to build and to plant." Jeremiah 1:10
i just feel something is stirring inside. something is moving my heart so much.
I do ask myself, am i loving God and people enough? and its this feelings and emotions, and circumstances that tells me, yes, you are.
I am a failure before Him, but i am His prince, His Son in His eyes.

God, people can fall away, but i will not, i refuse.
even if theres 10000001 reasons to doubt you.
i will still have 1 reason to worship you.
and thats all because of you.
its all because of you
and what you have done.

2009-10-13T00:19:00.000-07:00

heey guys!!! yesterday was the coolest day ever! this is the firrst time we had hanged out with cheryl for so long, and for so FUN!!!!! arcade and movies are THE BEST.
be warned.
if you are going to watch 500 days of summer, please change your mind mann.
during the movie, i smsed Cheryl and asked her if she was sleeping. HAHA.
she asked me if people on my left enjoyed the movie.
and i said, "yep, they seem quite interested"
She said "haha, good"
and i exclaimed "No... if they are interested in this kind of show, its so wrong. haha. "

oh well, thats just the world, we are just seeking to be entertained, but i think for me, its not the right kind of entertainment. should have ATE meatballs, erm sorry, watch meatballs. HAHA.
its awesome man, you shld look at the photos that we have in Cheryl's facebook. hanging out with cheryl is the MOST FUN THING ever!
hahahahaha (: wanna be like her! next time leading my own CG, just going out with my friends and really building relationship and learning from each other and knowing each other. Its awesome man!
fourth dimension is such a great book mann (: i am going to try praying more spiritually, more powerfully later. (:

2 Timothy 3:13-14
But evil men will grow worse and worse, deceiving and being deceived. But you must continue in the things which you have learned and been assured of, knowing from whom you have learned.

a verse that God gave me when i was doubting. when you doubt, just dont care! just keep telling yourself, i have learned this from pastor, my leaders and they learnt from God, so i can trust them and be assured. and just keep doing what you have been doing! dont be afraid, just keep doing! (:

just keep on keeping on! (:

2009-10-08T02:04:00.000-07:00

Hey guys. just felt like blogging, about F23.
F23 to me is not only just a CG, its like a family, when i know about that we are going to split CG, i was both sad, yet excited (:
its been around a year since i was in F23. i remember i came at around this point of date into F23 when Samantha asked me if i wanted to join F23. i was initially afraid, but i was quite assured when i knew Jordan. he was a really nice guy and he encouraged me to jump with him during zone f service. and i did. hahah. that was my first time jumping, and it was a good experience, now you want me to jump in church, i can do so anytime. HAHA. F23 was a great family to me and i never forget about it. i grew to become closer with Nicholas, and he soon became my leader. The first CG i attended was in december. i remembered Cheryl commented about me being a "friend producer". and apparently everyone laughed about it. HAHA. it was a week after i came into F23 and it was me and my denzel's birthday. then the CG celebrated our birthday for us (:
a few months had passed and i remembered that i shared testimony at main service in Feb with Nick and Jordan.
F23 had been such a great place for me to learn and to grow so much closer to God. it was amazing (: i believe that F61 is going to be a place to grow others as well, just the way i had grown in F23.
i love F23
and i love F61.
The Future Is Gonna Be Amazing (:

2009-09-14T02:48:00.000-07:00

Into your hands
I commit again
with all I am
to you Lord

You hold my world
in the palm of your hand
and i am yours
forever.

Jesus I believe in You
Jesus I belong to You
You're The Reason That I Live
The Reason That I sing
With All I am

I'll walk with You
wherever You go
through tears and joy
I'll trust in You
and I will live in all of Your ways
Your promises
Forever

Jesus I believe in You
Jesus I belong to You
You're the reason that I live
the reason that I sing
With All I Am

i will worship
i will worship you
i will worship you
i will worship you

I promise, never to shed a single tear for this world anymore.
God, I love you.

smiles (:

2009-09-13T06:16:00.000-07:00

today was quite a phew.
i managed to made it for BMT(A), but i was intending to go for main service as well.
BMT ended at 12noon. and the whole thing was quite a rush with 5mins of break in between. lol.
when BMT ended,went down with Aaron. at first we wanted to buy green tea for Cheryl, then realised that we didnt have the money. haha.
When we were in NTUC, this was what happened...
called mum, asked if i can go for main...
she shouted me down...
in long johns: "Should i go or not ar??" *talking to myself*
alright, i will go no matter the cost.
my conviction, from today onwards, is THIS: I will respond to the call of God, no matter what the cost,i will go for Him!!!!
then i was determined, despite knowing that i would get into trouble.
then my sister called, and told something about being wise, which was quite true. and i hesitated. really hesitated. i started to doubt, to waver, shaken so powerfully that i lost sight, and i was so confused.
sorry Marcus, i let you see the emo side of me. haha...
at that point, i seriously didnt thought of anything else, except for : next week bmt, shouts,quarrels, cold war, dissapointments.
i felt so lost at that time and i got so confused. my mind wasnt right, it went straight off the main road.
at that time, i didnt even thought of seeking God. gosh.
i just sat there, lost. stared. debated.
went to macs with Marcus, had a great talk with him.
at that point, i was, completely, lost. i didnt even had a clear thinking. i was worked up, nervous, heart pumping like crazy, swallowed lots of saliva, you can tell how worked-up i was at that time. haha.
i think, what Marcus said was quite true, which really impacted me alot.
Walk this Christian walk and never look back.(by Pastor Lia)Dont look to the left, to the right, just FOCUS on God!!! even if we are wrong, just smile and get over it. learn from it.
from the moment, i stood up and told Marcus "let's go", i feel something lifted up from my heart. like a burden was gone. i felt a much stronger peace, a much simpler mind, and my thoughts cleared off.
had a really great service. Pastor Kevin was great! Just realised that i am not boring :D heng ar! LOL.
when i got home, i was stepping in front of the gate. i heard my mum's voice. i told God, "God, give me strength"
and i opened the door and went in.
i told myself not to say anything, just keep quiet.
it lasted for 45mins, and the worse thing is, i nearly fell asleep. LOL
i was feeling so drowsy! you gotta understand mann, i woke up at 6.55am for BMT. HAHA.
felt so tired, but energised again when i worshipped God.
felt my faith rising, and my hopes too (:
i think, it really matters to trust and convictions.
i really gotta trust God WITH ALL MY LIFE. even if it means the ability to go church against my parent's will. I gotta lay down my life! ALL my life!
Convictions, what can i say?
felt that i was spiralling down for quite awhile.
but not anymore.
i think probably, this is because God is in this period of really toughening me up, really strenghten me and building me.
of all the things that was hurled at me, i was able to maintain. its just the period before the hurling part that i have to decide if i wanted to be hurled at.
decision changes our life. i cant afford to be indecisive!!
theres so much in my life that i need to change. i suddenly felt like a new christian. haha! i am already one year old. i still dont have what it takes to be a PTL just yet...
when situations get out of hand,
i think i gotta really stay calm. if things the day before happened, i didnt got upset the next day.i think i must learn on the situation itself to keep my emotions under control.
bye guys. today was such a day.
i thank God for His presence, His power. i thank Him for giving me great friends.
thanks Marcus. (: Love you mann. haha.
bye! (:

the fight of PO. continues...

2009-09-06T07:03:00.000-07:00

Hey guys first time blogging on iPhone !! So cool. I felt the urge to share with you guys something. I found the reason for my po. And why God has allowed po into my life. Frankly speaking I don't blame God for what happened to me. Cos I trust God that He has a plan for me. Which I want to share with you guys now.recently thoughts of status often came into my mind. When people that rises up faster than I am, plus they are a younger Christian than i am, I start to think, was k spritually imatured? Was i incapable in some way? But the answer starts with my po. As we know, po disables our availability very much, and what church is looking for Is availability. Since I have po, I am greatly hindered with alot of church events and I cannot handle lots of important stuff, if last minute becos of my po, the whole thing crashed, that wouldn't be good isn't it. But why ? Why did God allow po into my life to stop me from rising up, and even let my dad know that I have been going to church and handicap me from even going to church? God knows that I have been thinking too much about status. He saw that I was serving with the wrong mindset. He wanted me to come back to serve Him, for no leadership, but to be satisfied to serve Him just as we want to serve Him. Recently I found out that my hunger for God is slightly dropping off. God wanted me to understand that serving Him must not be of for the status. But jus for what he had done and added and impacted my life, i want to serve Him. This christian walk is meant to be simple. We should not be serving just for the sake for title. The more we try to prove ourselves to people that we can be a leader and neglect the heart of serving God, the more
we won't rise up. Instead, why don't we just keep doing what we have been doing, and prove to God that we will be faithful in these things despite the status, and tell God that we will try our best to learn. God sees it and He will allow you to rise up. Growth is in God's hand and He will decide when to let you grow. God works in funny ways, yet productive than all our ways. I have found such goodness in God, have you? I encourage you to seek the goodness of God today :)

2009-09-05T21:59:00.000-07:00

Hey guys! i brokethrough! YES
despite being stopped in going, i still managed to go service yesterday, served in usher. it WAS SUCH A DAY.
yet my mum still dont know about it, haha...
but nothing is gonna stop me from coming to God.
God is my life.
I am afraid of offending my parents when i go church, i am afraid that they will be dissapointed if i go church, i am afraid that they will scold me if i go church, i am afraid that they will be angry if i go church. but i am more afraid of losing and dissapointing God if i didnt go church.
dont stop me. please.
i cant be stopped anyway (:
i am just a God-addict.
let me satisfy my own addiction.

2009-09-03T01:37:00.000-07:00

hey guys, life has not been very smooth sailing for me. haha
but i refuse to be emo, or to be sad or go crazy. i will breakthrough.
my Physics spa is SCREWED! my graph, i drew a curve instead of a best-fit line. OH MAN.
my instant noodle was screwed just now. too much boiling water, then the soup overflow.
worst of all.
my dad found out that i have been going to church.
and now, its gonna be awhile before i can go back. BUT I TRUST GOD.
God has been in my life for so long, if i cant even tust him, who else can i trust?
this is not a season of stopping me from going to church,oor unlikiness. this is a season of breakthrough.
i believe, and i trust in God. God is an awesome God.
i believe. i believe. i believe.

2009-08-31T02:20:00.000-07:00

Got a feeling that i have become more and more emo nowdays. emoster.
though i seemed to be always so high, loud-spoken and stuff. i think in the inside, i tend to think too much, though i never really express it.
oh well, from yesterday till today, i had never stop having the feeling of wanting to cry. Handphone confiscated, parents screaming, not understanding, things not going well in school, thinking too much. sometimes i really want to handle it between me and God. i dont want to depend too much on friends, but have the God-factor more in my life.
you can say i am weak, but God uses the weak. He gives strength to the weak.
maybe God is toughening me up through this, that even i am unable to connect with friends, talking to them, am i still keeping strong and relying on Him completely, or am i just depending on my friends in this christian walk?
haha, i intended this to be quite an emo post. lol.
i cant be emo already! snap out of it :)
come to think of it, i seemed to be encountering with the same things i had encountered with before, but i think this time round its different.
Everything's gonna be alright :)
God's here.

2009-08-25T02:20:00.000-07:00

hey guys! change of blog skins, all thanks to the crashing of my previous blog skin. AIYO.
Spend like around 1/2 hr in changing this skin. LOL
today was far too awesome mann. i think what i really gotta do now is to change, and Trust in God, my Leaders, my friends. i think it will really break their heart when they have sown so much into our lives, yet we dont trust them, yet we done believe in them and love them as they have loved us. Our leaders and friends loves us, regardless of how evil things we had once done or had done. They love us, believed in us and are always encouraging us. Those invisible things that you cant see are them praying for you, worrying for you, talking to their leaders about you and lots more. the least we can do, is to trust them. Even if sometimes they might not be working in the way you might want things to work out, but trust them! they have more spiritual knowledge and experiences than you, thats why they are appointed leaders over you. trust them! :)

2009-08-21T19:46:00.000-07:00

its fun mann! reading people's archive, and my very own.
i was really emo when i am young, and the choice of words i use are also KIDDY. LOL
God is amazing, just so happy that i have grown out of insecurities and now, God's in control, i am in control :)
God is amazing.
and i notice something, i kept ending off my post with this
PRAISE THE LORD

2009-08-19T02:36:00.000-07:00

2 Corinthians 11:3 (NKJV)
But i fear,lest somehow,as the serpent deceived Eve by his craftinesss,so your minds may be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ.

hey, this post is dedicated to people who might totally think that God is bad and everything. i am here to stand up for God. i am not addressing this post directly to anyone, but i am trying to stand up for God, and if i can, try to explain(not fully) about the love of God. i know that i will definitely be unable to explain everything of God(if i can, i might as well be God!haha!), but i hope this short post helps.

as seen in 2 Corinthians 11:3
Christ was meant to be SIMPLE. it is not as complicated as what we all think it is! true, there is much more to learn about God, christianity and spiritual maturity. but did God said something like He so loved the world that He sent his son to die for us to know the complexity of Christ? nope, but He said:

John 3:16 For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.

God didnt meant for Christ to be complicated. its really simple. Just believe and you will be saved. Believe is the word. The whole gospel is summarised by one verse, and thats John 3:16, see how simple the gospel is.
but for us to attain spiritual maturity, go on to a higher level with God, we will go on into the more inner depths and understanding of God. thats what discipleship classes, BMT, AMT are for. if you are saved, you can choose to be stagnant and be a Christian that believes in God, or you can choose to be on-fire, radical and do great things for God, understanding Him and move on towards him. Its quite funny if you want to believe in God,but you are not bothered to understand His love and everything. due to this, people think Christ is complicated. but its not.

Some people must have think that why God created the devil? like how Ivan, Justin and alot of people puts it, God didnt created the devil. He created an angel called Lucifer, and Lucifer was jealous of humans and wants to spoil God's creation and prove to God that He was wrong to create humans, cos he saw how much God loved humans. therefore, not wanting to run in this way with God, he fell, and he tried to corrupt God's creation in Adam and Eve. Would a normal human being like you and I create something that goes against us?i think that will be pure stupidity.what more is it for God?
True, God must have sensed that Lucifer was turning his back on him before he really backslided, but God gave him, and all angels, and all humans, and EVERYONE in the world the most Powerful gift in the world. Choice.
if God didnt gave us the power of choice, what for He create living,fleshly human beings? He can just create robots that will do His bidding instead of us who sometimes stubbornly refuse to listen to Him. but God loved us and He gave us this power. again, i do not know why God wants to create humans(if i know everything, i might as well be God).
but one thing i know for sure, He did not created humans for sadistic reason,to do evil things, but He created each human being with a specific purpose and ability. God is a God of freedom. we have songs like "Freedom" from C3, "its for FREEDOM that Christ has set us free". God gave us the power of choice to do anything, yes anything we want! its a powerful substance that is not to be abused, when abused, i believe you know the consequences. God is not a God of condemnation, God is a God of REDEEMER. He will not condemn us for not believing in Him. He did not sit in the throne and say "WAH, this person ar, why dont believe in me? i will curse him like crazy until he knows my power."
instead of wasting His time thinking of all that, and also that His thoughts of us are thoughts of peace, not of evil to give us a hope and a future, He thinks a ways to bring us to Him. notice, its bringing us to Him, but NOT deciding for us if we are going to accept Him into our lives. remember! we are given the power of choice, God is not going to take away this power, He can do whatever it takes to convince us, example like, His presence, anointing, revelation, encounters, miracles, testimonies and so forth. but ultimately, the choice is yours. we cannot say that God "forced us to get saved". did you ever hear God telling you "you must accept me now or you die!" He does everything to cause us to start believing in Him, but to accept Him or not, is your choice.

When you accept God into your life, i believe that you have alot more to gain! i don't think a part of your flesh is gone when you accept God. but differentiate between sacrifice, and losing something. Sacrifice is a willing suffering, a willingness to lose something for God.

i believe that people will change their bad ways, with or without God in their lives, if that person really believed that he is wrong, and he changes, great! but from my experience, and when you come into a situation where nobody seemed to understand your pain, your struggle to change, will you still want to change? will you still be determined to change? for example, you smoke, and you want to change, knowing that its wrong. However, your parents dont understand your struggle and scolds you again and again despite you wanting to change, wont you feel insecure and helpless? however, with God, i believe that you will feel this love that will keep driving you to change, to strive on. i have experienced this before, and if you wanna know, ask me.

Hebrews 4:15-16 "For we do not have a High Priest(Jesus) who cannot symphathise with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need."

Jesus in all ways was tempted with us. i do not believe that Jesus wasnt tempted to lie, swear, dishonour his parents, insecure about His status as son of a carpenter despite being known as the Son of God, doubts of God, tempted sexual immorally. but YET, He is without sin!
Jesus=God=Holy Spirit the holy trinity.
Since Jesus=God, God was able to understand every single temptation and problems we faced in our lives! You must be thinking that Jesus is God, of course He can prevent himself from sinning, not true! in the bible it says that Jesus put aside ALL His divine priviliges, and OVERCAME every single temptation with His FLESH. if Jesus is able to overcome this as a human, we can! that is what makes Jesus so unique! this came from Pastor AR Bernard's sermon.

when you sin, you are at fault. true. and sometimes we keep saying that devil is the cause of it, and we make him sound like the "scapegoat". its true that we are the one who sinned, and the devil was tempting us to sin. so when we sin, we cannot say that its devil that make us do that and we have nothing to do with it. remember! the power of choices. However, the devil is evil. for example, when you smoke, who is the one who cause you to smoke? your friend influnced you, then we go on and on with friends who influence friends...to the first person who smoke in the world, and who tempt him to sin? the devil. but the choice is really in your hands. devil is the tempter, and you are the one who make that choice, to sin or not. but remember, before you sin, remember the fear of God, after you sin, remember the love of God. Pastor How said that.

What you believe in, is really up to you. i love you despite what you believe in. I can love without evangelising, but i cant evangelise without loving.
I love you.
and most of all, God loves you.
i really hope this helps you, i felt the Holy Spirit guiding my to type this post. it wasnt my strength alone.
thank God.
i am able to stand till this day, still holding onto Him. i hope you do too :)
love you

2009-08-16T02:08:00.000-07:00

today discipleship class was way too awesome man.
to hear how much Pastor Loved us, cared for us, believed in us, and take the effort to know us. i am really touch. i really feel like loving them more,honoring them more. they really went the extra mile, and i just so wanna love them. For their love has really actions.
Pastor How's birthday is coming soon! i really want to do something. something out of my own initiative.
Pastor How and Pastor Lia. I LOVE YOU :)

2009-08-10T01:43:00.000-07:00

Hey guys. just feel like posting today, its a free day today! but theres geog test tmr, in which i havent study yet!
haha. i suggest you guys go read 1Corinthians 9:9-27. its an awesome verse about evangelism!
recently, i am quite moved by the word trust.
sometimes, like what Ivan said. Believe is the most simplest yet hardest thing to do.
its the same for trust too.
trust is something you have to build, something we gotta slowly build and grow in. i wouldnt expect you to totally trust someone when you first met him, even in the case of God.
but afterall, learn to trust in God's people, whom you have been with. they are the real and genuine people.
trust.
the most powerful substance for two to work together.

2009-08-07T05:08:00.001-07:00

hey people!!! :) GI Joe was a way great movie. especially when you watch it with F23. i promise you, its a movie even you will never forget. HAHA.
a pity i didnt sit behind nick they all, beside jordan, or else i can disturb them with him. HAHA. but i was continuously "SHHHHHH" them in school. HAHA. you should have seen the floor of the theatre. i pity the cleaner going to clean it. its full of popcorn. LOL. haha...
Things have been going great mann. i look forward to the next regular frm mshs. its gonna be real soon mannn :)
oh well, dun really feel like typing. wanna play some games. hahah. maybe rakion. WHOOTS
chem spa o level is OVER. now have 2more spa HAHA.
sometimes, life may go against you. but never fear, God is here.
haha. today in cg, they sung my favourite song: Hosanna. the song which i have recieved 4 revelations. perhaps i will blog about all this four. or maybe i have blogged about it already!
come to think about it, the post i had last time was rather emo. LOL
haha, see ya people! :)

2009-08-07T05:08:00.000-07:00

2009-08-01T22:41:00.000-07:00

sorry people, havent been really blogging, i am trying to eliminate computer time for studying, i havent been studying much! I WANT 20 HOURS OF STUDY.

i gotta plan my finances too. this is a good chance to tell the whole world that i only receive $17 a week as allowance. haha. i may not be that rich, but i believe that God is training me to sacrifice.

Sacrifice. a willingness to suffer. i am willing to suffer.

sometimes we tell ourselves and God. "God, i am willing to suffer for you, even to die for you"

but i realised, that when such situations really do come, are you still sticking to that conviction you have? i am not embarassed to say that i do feel wavered when such situations comes to me.

but ultimately, am i willing to "burn than bow down to the devil"

ask yourself, who are you burning for?

just got some revelations a few months ago, but never really told everyone about it, some are quite amazing.

one of them is this.

in 1Kings 4:20 "Judah and Israel were as numerous as the sand by the sea in multitude,eating and drinking and rejoicing"

and 1Kings 4:29 "and God gave Solomen wisdom and exceedingly great understanding,and largeness of heart like the sand on the seashore"

do you notice anything?

yeah, its the Sand by the sea thats the same.

Solomen had a Big heart for the people

amazing.

i want to have a big heart for people. :)

2009-07-17T06:13:00.000-07:00

barang barang is ever so cool. HAHA. i mean when we are in it. LOL.

my dad is coming tmr!! SO HAPPY.

i remember that God told me to give him $100 for building fund. right now i have arnd $20. have been trying. but i wanna give God my best!

i am selling my yugioh deck here. does anyone wanna buy?

cards like :Cyber Dragon, Cyber phoenix, power bond, overload fusion...

got dark magicians, dark magician girl.

they are in an ok-ok condition. i just gotta sell them real fast to get money. please buy it immediately from me if you want! just leave a tag at my blog, or just sms me. thanks!

whew. i wanna give God my best, when He gave me His best.

when he tells me to do something, He will give me the strength and the things i need to do it. i just gotta put in effort. $17 a week. ITS POSSIBLE TO SAVE UP $100!!

God is great (:

2009-07-09T23:35:00.000-07:00

i'm listening, I'm Learning to Fall by boys like girls
how true, sometimes we ought to learn how to fall.
if not, when we fall, we go all negative, emotional, and we refuse to stand up. thats bad.
today, was walking up the stairs for chem spa. i saw this guy, who was looking super emo. he sat alone on the stairs for 3periods. i came forward and just asked him, like "hey, do you need any help?" he just shook his head. and i just told him "hey, you need help, just come 3L look for us" i had no choice but to leave. Gerard stayed behind, talked to him and asked his class to sent someone to get him back. i should have been there. who cares about lesson when one life can be brought to God right now? i was foolish not to evangelise.
haha. i have learnt! (:
playing restaurant city and farmville.
dont worry. christians aint going against christians (:

2009-06-30T02:45:00.000-07:00

i've got great friends: Ivan, Cheryl, Nicholas, Jordan, Leona, Marcus, Yili, Yihui, Caleb, Justin, Aaron, Denzel, Edmund, Wen Cong.

and i have got such a great God.

what more can i complain?
what more should i doubt?
what more should i be sad about?
i have them.
and thats enough.
:)
they are my great friends.
friends that i will never forget.
and friends that stick with me till the end.
i run this race with them, and i run this race with God.
it was so COOL talking to the sa friends that nick,jordan,leona,marcus brought. they are so AWESOM! people like gerwym, cleon, kenneth, yihui, yili. they are so COOL!
haha, i long to see my more mshs guys too!
marcus had said and prayed for: seats for 10.
and i was thinking of coming up a slogan, HAHA.
Hearts of 10.
does it sound cool? haha...
kk, see ya :)

p.s. I love you :)

2009-06-29T00:43:00.000-07:00

though sad,i will continue to worship!!! the presence of God is great. yesterday i was feeling emo, and i seriously dont know why, but this feeling just come. and nick told me to worship God. i did, although abit distracted by msn, i worshipped, suddenly, tears came into my eyes, without any whatsoever reason.
haha, God is funny :) when i feel emo for whatsoever reason, He makes me feel comforted and touched for no whatsoever reason :)
God is not only my comforter. He is my Father, my saviour, my Lord. i will come to Him, regardless of any reasons, i will still go to Him.
Break my heart for what breaks yours. God's heart is seeking towards the Lost, and i will go with Him to the lost, till WE FIND THE LOST!!!
6people had been rescued from the Lost. if i have to give up my lifevest for at least for another lost, i will give it.
God told me that if i want to have the heart for men, then i must seek first the heart of God.
and God's heart is filled with love, compassion and every single good thing inside.
only through seeking His heart, will i get this things :)

God is amazing. i still believe in God.

2009-06-26T05:52:00.000-07:00

this few days had been a WHOOOOSH to me.

i have just been facing alot recently. feeling abit emo now.haha, and i am playing such an emo song, I'm Still Breathing by Katy Perry.

at least, even if those things had smack me down, i'm still breathing :)

through all this, i can really see myself growing in experience, and like what Daniel had said during discipleship class, ultimate worship: making a decision to worship even though the situation is bad.

i also have learnt this three steps :Understand, Clarify and Help. can say its like a revelation from God.

among all this three, understand is the most important. without even first understanding what happened, trying to clarify or help, it might end up messing the whole thing up, or make it worse.

Clarify, by clearing all untruths, and sharing what you stand in.

Help, by encouraging and giving solutions(if possible) and to really show the person that you care and give him all the love and help he needs :)

God has given me such a great revelation, He wants me to learn :)

Understand, Clarify and Help.

Not too leader-ish, more of Friendish. haha. Cheryl taught me that :) She is such an amazing person. haha.

Sometimes, i feel that i want to cry, but the tears dont come. you can say that i am a person that lets go easily. i dont really linger in sadness for a very long time or insecurity. but will sometimes get reminded of it.

people in this world, no matter how evil you are, what bad you have done to me, or to anyone.

i promise you this.

God stills love you.

and i will Love you too :)

cheers, thats it today :)

went to watch transformers with the guys today. what an amazing show. i was totally shocked when Optimus Died in the middle. HAHA SPOILER.

dunno, why, but i am such a fan of emo songs. LOL

yeps, thats it. i want to go sleep, but theres HOMEWORK to be done OMG.

haha, just 2 more pages of physics, one 700word chinese essay, 250 Chinese Idioms(which i think i dont wanna bother liaox) :)

haha, see ya :)

2009-06-20T23:40:00.000-07:00

What Happened to the world?

one day you stare at the sky

thinking about the day

thinking what have i done

to deserve this

where

is the true God that i seek

facing too much

you want to fall

you want to let go

you want to stop resisting

you believe that fall

is the only way

but something

someone

tells you

keep fighting

we love you

we care

your tears drips

but

you still want to give up

where

where is the God of miracles?

there

there He is

right there

with opened arms

waiting

waiting for me to come

He is always there

ALWAYS THERE

but i always turn

and look the other way

God is there

He is there

i run

i run with faith

i run to Him

GOD! SAVE ME!

God says

"You are free"

haha, quite an emo post right, i was thinking of illustrating more. lol. but still, this just flow into my mind, so i just wrote it down. last time, i had times i wanted to give up, but i had also times when God just spoke into my heart, and i really cry, becos of his presence.

there are people around who care too. great Leaders like Cheryl, Nicholas, Jordan, Marcus, Leona are always there for us to cheer us on. without them, i knew that i wouldnt stayed strong. i would have died away from Christ.

MSHS group is really growing. Aaron, denzel, edmund is really growing spiritually and in hunger for God. they are amazing people. coming for 2svc a week and really sowing alot in the revival. amazing. i can feel that this revival is moving. :)

Mshs: 15 regulars. it is possible :)

2009-06-07T22:30:00.000-07:00

hey guys, just wanna put some photos on my blog, haha!! i was just rumagging through my 400 photos in my phone and i saw this.

this photo was taken 2 YEARS AGO. i had such a kiddy face. i think my sis is going to kill me for putting this up. haha! didnt know that i have a sis?? haha, she's in B4!!! HAHAH :)

the following photo was taken a few months ahead i think. haha, my sis abit unglam, but i still posted it. HAHAH!!!

haah!! this photo was taken like, a few weeks back!! :) see, me and her grown so much liaox.

its great to have an elder sister mann :)

i must say, i really am thankful to my sis, and the people who brought my sis three years ago. my sister reached out to me and my heart was touched by God. her fight of faith kept me going and due to PO at home,i began to be more on-fire. :)

my sis is great. haha!! if you think so, please tag at my tagboard. HAHA!

2009-06-07T06:01:00.000-07:00

hey people! i have been visiting people's blog recently, especially the integrations. haha. i find that some integrations are really cool, they are growing so fast!!! :) i am so amazed mann, by God's love and mercy and His ability to change one life. i look at the mshs guys, i am so proud of them too! they have been coming for DOUBLE service, and they have been very strong in ministry. also, i am amazed by how edmund is able to evaluate and find out how an integration is feeling, what is stopping him from coming back :)
they are going to be tested by God soon, i believe that God will give them the strength to overcome this mountains, and that He will give me the strength to oversome mountains that i may face too :)

evangelism and inviting people to church is abit harder than last year. now is a total new begining and a total new start. but i will keep on keeping on, and pray even harder now :)
been receiving quite alot of rejects of invitation, but i shan't lose heart. i must have FAITH, not fear, and to BELIEVE that they will make it for serivce.i really miss the times where i pray with a loud voice and keep pressing into God's presence. i want this feeling again!! :)

i notice some changes in me too. haha. but some of them is quite negative, so must really ,really get OUT of it!!!! :)

so what if things hadnt been great? so what if i had alot of setbacks? i rmb that day that i was totally self condemning. i was constantly under pressure of guilt by the sin and was realyl upset with myself. i told God that i want to come clean, and i confessed every sin. i have been trying to talk to cheryl about it, haha. but during the wait, i told God that i want to let this go, believing that He had cleansed it for me already. but right now, i just have to stop thinking too much, trust God and let it go. Let GO :)

sometimes, it's good to let go. you will feel more peace and assured, but of course, you need a solution to guard yourself against this sin when it comes again :)

right now, i have learnt to LET GO, and also to be a big hearted man. letting go in different manners :)

God is so cool :) Love God, Love you :)

2009-06-01T23:44:00.000-07:00

hey guys!! i have been blogging quite recently :) been quite bored recently, i WANNA PLAN AN INTEGRATION OUTING WITH MY MSHS GUYS!

haha, if you notice in my facebook, i want to come clean, totally clean.
i want to confess everything to God and just tell Him EVERYTHING. theres no need to hide. i cant hide anyway. hahaa
been having a few problems with myself that are totally seriously putting me off. i am happy that i can get to talk with cheryl about it this wed :)

Yesterday, while doing quiet time, God has just showed me what it meant about His presence. i had been wondering about it and God had slowly answered me. So far, God told me that revelations and great ideas flows into my mind when His presence is there.
i think what Pastor had said was really great. to smile in prayer, in worship.i think it really works. i was more spiritually lifted and i start to enjoy praying and it set my hunger to want to worship Him more.

as usual, i was emoing, cos i felt very lonely, lost, confused. i hung on to this confusions and sins, and God cant work in me. but i chose to let go, and ask God to sent His peace and comfort on me. but i was still emo, cos despite me wanting Him to come, i still clung on to this things. but i remembered what Pastor Lia told us about, and i smiled. i tried smiling, and asked God to come and i felt myself emotionally lifted. i felt much better, much better :) and i totally let it go.

i fell in love once again with PlanetShakers worship song. i thank my sis so much for buying their album a few years back. their worship songs are so great!! Angel Cry Holy, Holy Spirit was great songs. and I'm Forever Yours from another album was such a great song! i sang till this part of the lyric "Hold me now and never ever let me go" and i thought, God, will you hold me on and dont let me go? and suddenly, the word "yes" came into my mind. i knew it wasnt me, cos i felt such great and immense joy filled my heart, and i was so in awe of Him.

i have such a great God, and i must learn to be content in whatever the circumstance.

How Great is Our God. :)

2009-05-31T06:05:00.000-07:00

insecurities sucks.

i want to get out of it.

2009-05-28T23:57:00.000-07:00

hey, like this new skin?? :)

i wanted to change my skin for a looong time, now i have the chance! haha!!

things have not been going well, hahas. just feeling insecure and confuse about things, God is amazing, when i told him yesterday that i wanted to forget all this things, put it into His hands and just get on with life, and not getting this things affecting me.
today He gave me an answer to my doubts.
when i was walking down my house stairs to go school, take circle line (yeah!) i was thinking : have i really love God, or doing this revival and stuff for the sake of it. and i suddenly had this thought, if i had not love God, i wouldnt had depended on Him, i wouldnt have really understood His amazing power and grace, moreover, i let this total stranger into my life 2years ago and my life was totally changed! and through this, i stopped my sinful ways, and because i loved Him. also, i did this revival and bringing friends, because i loved God and so i love this people, to want to bring them.

wow, :)

well, thats it for today! i wanna go rakion. haha!! listening to Paper Gangster by Lady GaGa now. she is cool :)

circle line is great tooo!!! i am 5mins away from school!! i woke up at 6.40am today, reach school at 7.10am. LOL. i rmb i came out of house at 6.50am HAHA!!!

the feeling of a new skin is great :)

2009-05-25T22:07:00.000-07:00

whew, the weekends just passed, all the fun is over, but i shall lift the value of my day!!!! :)
i have been rather sick this few days. its so irritating!!! having to take medicine and now feeling drowsy. i hope june holidays will come faster, but cant go out during the holidays is absolutely pointless.
we are going science centre this thursday, yeah... -.-
talk, talk and talks this whole week, what a great way to end the term! we should just spend our time in class and chat :)
redrain was cool, seeing the MSHS regulars bringing 1 or 2 friends, its great to see them really making an effort to evangelise :)

kk, see ya :)

2009-05-21T21:02:00.000-07:00

REDRAIN IS JUST ONE MORE DAY!! OMG!! :)

its great man! having a few new friends coming for redrain, sad thing is that npcc camp clashes with redrain, make me has lesser invites >< but there will be more chances!!!!! :)
great integrations, new friends are gonna come, and i know that its going to be exciting! this time, i can come totally with my parents acknowlegement, FOR TWO DAYS!!! :)
this year redrain is going to be different, with new friends coming, and i am so going to beliebe that its going to turn out great! :)

been hurt recently, but thats alright, i choose to let go, and i dunn wanna linger in the past either, knowing that it will only hurt me. haha. btw, did i say that i was blogging in school? LOL! !
edmund,aaron and denzel are great. they are really growing alot and being super radical for God :) its really great to see that the friends you bought became so radical and on-fire :)

i am watching yugioh,but its laggin like mad. LOL

oh well. i think i will sign off here. :) see ya AT REDRAIN :)

2009-05-20T05:27:00.001-07:00

Redrain is just 3 days away man. things have been great. i am so going to see 20++ new friends in church this week :)

had a great prayer meeting with Nick and the SA guys :) then went for sermon screening, cool :)

i am nearly sick, with my sister sick too. have dry and itchy throat and keeps coughing. lol.

Cheryl went my house that day!! so cool. she shared about shepherd's heart. so amazing. i dont want to sit there and run away or dont do anything, but i want to make something happen. to protect my people, to protect my friends, my school.

i rather burn then bow down to you while going against my convictions.

2009-05-16T20:57:00.000-07:00

RedRain is coming. in 5 DAYS TIME!!!!!

i remember last year i went, the song that impacted me was I SEE RED, RAINING DOWN ON ME, RED RESCUED ME!

haha, it was a cool experience now, redrain not only meant just a concert now :) it meant a great day for evangelism :)
its gonna be a total exciting event, with rock music, jumping around and total coolness!!! WOAH its one big event that will blow you away! and its happening in my church!!!!

Location : Singpost Centre Paya Lebar
time: Saturday (5pm-7pm) Sunday(3pm-5pm)
TICKETS ARE NECESSARY! want them? get it from Denzel, Me, Aaron and Edmund today!

this is one big event. be there :)

2009-05-10T05:40:00.000-07:00

haha,today i am free!! just a few more hours till the end of the day :)

i wanna do abit of reflection about my life today! :)

2000-2006: total insecure person. really really hungers for love and attention. i was constantly bullied, out casted in school and i usually was alone, only had 1 true friend whom i had lost contact with, really wanted to bring him to Christ. i tried to ignore these people sayings about me, but i could only suppress it awhile, and the insecureness comes back again. 2006 was the first year i came to knew God after my sister got saved :) my sister told me about things about God, i listened,but i was amazed. sometimes i do mock my sister about her religion,now i was very guilty HAHA but its over!! who knows, now i am an on-fire christian! :)

2007-2008: the years that i learnt MORE, FAR MORE about God!! sec1 i started to knew very much about God and i was very much impacted. i wanted to go church and check it out, but my mother rejected, saying that my sister goes church in extreme hours(which is not very true),and that she dont want me to be the same. :( but i shall have faith that one day, they will let me come. my father allowed, but my mother hadnt got won over yet, but i trust God :)
sec1 i took on vulgarities and also started speaking death,its like speaking death is in my genes HAHA. at sec2, i awoke from this and started shaking it off :) cos i knew God far deeper and i convicted my life to Him, i visited heart of God church at 25 May 2008 RED RAIN!!! i didnt dare to jump, sing, but i have a seed sown, and i wanted to come back, but PDA stopped me. haha

2009~ Life was good. my spiritual family was always there for me to push me on, to encourage me. God has been putting multiple tests on me and sometimes i fail and wanted to give up. but God is FAITHFUL! He never leaves me, nor forsake me when i have left Him, or thinking of forsaking Him! Deuteronomy 31:6 "Be strong and be of good courage.Do no fear or be afraid of them; for the Lord your God, He is the one who goes with you, He will not leave you nor forsake you"

wow, God is great, i love the bible, just like what Pastor always says :)

who knows waht lies for me in the future?but i know that it is definitely a good one. my God is faithful, and He is definitely a rewarder of thos who diligently seek Him.

this revival, i want it. this school, i want it. 30 lives, i want it. God, give it to me.
if i need to prove myself about it, i will :)

God, is faithful.

2009-05-09T00:38:00.000-07:00

hey guys! its been a month since i blogged. haha, abit lazy to update, cause exams around the corner!! haha

now, i am getting abit worried for my chem. haha. this time the maths paper was easier, but still, its too early to say that, i am VERY prone to careless mistakes. LOL

oh well, life has been exciting. although seeing some of my friends facing some problems, the way they rises up above it is always exciting, and the great thing is that i am actually involved in assisting them through it :)

evangelism has been GREAT! got to know a group of VERY fun sec1s, had really been like their friend :) had been talking to this sec1 who added our new gen email :) found out that he like singer that I LIKE! for example: Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift and Katy Perry!! he likes just dance too!!! SO COOOL!! :) way too cool mann :) typing with a laptop is quite tiring for the hand. lol.

having amath test next tuesday. hope that i can pass all my subjects! haha, i literally failed my 3-maths last term, emath, amath and PHYSICS!!!

hopefully, i can pass english too. hahah!!!

30 is my faith target for Redrain, and 30 is what i believe i am so going to get. i have been continually praying for it. now have to really VISUALISE 30. :)

things are going to change around here. :)

God has told me lots of things recently, something good qualities that i once had had somewhat just slipped off me sometimes. for example, the love for people. i had been distracted with other people that sometimes i forget about the people close to me, which they still need some of my love for them. and being radical for God, to even try attending service even though it may seem impossible, but there is no harm in asking or trying.

really am amazed with God. :) Deuteronomy 31:6 'Be strong and be of good courage,do not fear nor be afraid of them;For the Lord your God, He is the one that goes with you.He will not leave you nor forsake you' if you think that God has forsaken you, read this. he had not, and never will. :)

God's love.

who's love can be compared with his? :)

2009-04-14T00:58:00.000-07:00

hey guys! back to business! its been a week since i blog. haha

"true growth is the ability to regrow" an inspiring phrase right?a phrase given to me by God through Marcus(meaning God wanted Marcus to tell me this) thanks God, thanks Marcus :)

this phrase i awesome, cos before this phrase came to me, i have sinned against God in a most selfish way, and God forgive me :) and tadaa! He gave me this verse. awesome:)

i have been rather busy!! with the sa1 coming around the corner(like 2MAY!) and my mum just broke to me news that she wants me to work during june holidays, there goes my hols -.- oh whatever, God is going to show His miracles again, and i will be FREE! :)

i really want to go for BMT! but no chance ba, all becos of the crappy PO. argh. haha
next friday is 2.4KM RUN!!! WHOOO PON CCA!!! hehehe.
next next friday, NO MORE CCA!!! Whooo!! cca suspended cos of sa2. HAHAHA.

things are going my way. but will i still remain this cheerful when things dont go my way? i will try my best man. :)

alot of my classmates had been telling me to grow up, they say i very childish. haha. oh whatever :)

How Great Is Our God! :)

2009-04-05T05:57:00.000-07:00

today was the most impactful service ever.
before service, i was full of sorrow and worries, cos i had my physics test tmr, and i am really worried when i will be able to come back again.
and i was filled with sorrow during worship.
suddenly when everything was quiet. i heard God speaking to me
He said "have a little bit more faith and trust in me.dont self-condemn yourself anymore,whenever you lost faith and hope in Me.I understand"
then God gave me a vision. that He was beside me and i was just beside Him, although i didnt saw His face, but i knew it was Him. He stood down and patted my Head.
in another vision, He was hugging me.
wow.
i was super touched by what God said and the vision i got, and i teared, i was so touched by His presence and what He had said and i could felt a tear slip down my face.

How great is our God.
so comforting, loving and understanding.
i told God, "God, i will follow you."
today was amazing, very powerfully amazing.
i regretted not getting prayed for. haha.

things are going good man.

watch out, Pastor Lia might be reading my blog now. HAHA. yea i hope lol

2009-03-27T07:13:00.000-07:00

HEY GUYS! i am finally back to blog!

today cross country was TERRIBLE. run and starting got STITCHES. oh crap.

like, run around 1-2km. and i was like, struggling. i was dehydrated, and i nearly vomited. todally cannot run AT ALL. Mr. Qwayle literally soared past me. oh crap, i lost to a teacher 20plus years older than me. LOL. just find it so hard to run, so i walked fast. i wanted to listen to music and my earpiece got so frustratingly entangled. so finally, it was untangled, the songs i listened to was all worship songs. just to really just rely on God to help me with this run.

next problem, is that denzel has to go home first for his friends to get his bag and we really have no time. so have to rush like mad down. then, NO MONEY FOR CAB. OH CRAP

found someone to borrow money at last, got around 10bucks. THANKS SHAWN!

rushed down for cg,i found out that i sang louder than usual and prayed louder than usual too, haha! i was afraid that i will stink, if i do, pai seh. haha

God has really been putting me to the test, really just giving me situations and difficulties to handle. and i am relying on Him fully to settle with this =)

cookies! we need cookies! esther heng havent tell me the recipe LOL

anyway,things have been great, although some things going upside down, still, its my honour to be tested by God. =)

tata, see you again!

Leona--> Yakuza kaya toast ;)

2009-03-18T02:20:00.000-07:00

was watching star wars the clone wars movie(typical)
it is so cool! i finally watched it. AT LAST. :D

there is a few interesting and FUNNY scenes in the show itself. make me laugh like mad.

joke no.1
there is 2 clone troopers left against a battalion.
clone1:"hold on! we got you outnumbered"
droid sergeant:"outnumbered?! 1,2... ~BLAST~"

how dumb... lol. but it got me laughing.

chalet is cool! with Nick Luo getting stung(ouch), Ivan's cooking,visiting the old changi hospital(which i wanna go so badly). things, couldnt be more un! :D
sambal fish balls+watermeleon+sprite=makes Jian Ming the good cook. LOL

everythings cool. been feeling quite emo and confused. haha. oh well.
answer will be there if we seek :)

Purpose

2009-03-13T19:18:00.000-07:00

Hey guys, been thinking alot since yesterday. i think this is the best thoughts and spiritual thoughts i had so far! hahaha

as the title suggests, i am going to talk about purpose. so of you may not agree, but please do state in my tagboard that i may learn! :)

alrightz. i believe that everyone knows that each one of us HAVE a purpose in life in this world. God doesnt put us to this world for no whatsoever reason, but He sent His Son to die for us on the cross, because He loves us so much. and why? because we are precious and He wants us all to come into heaven to be with Him!

Precious--Purpose?? not really. but we are precious because we are all created by God and God sent us down WITH a purpose and God wants us to have an abundant life on Earth, getting to know Him and saved, and to eternal life in heaven! God loves us so much cos we are His Sons and Daughters. Like between a father and a son. it is a kind of love that i cannot really describe. but He had given us so much even when we dont know Him at all, even when we are not even born of this world. this shows the great love of God. (not just only this, cause God do MORE things to prove that He loves us, but this is the best!)

Everyone in this world has a purpose. no one can determine this purpose for you, only you can find this purpose. and the day you find this purpose, it will be with God and you will be with Him!

this is my section on purpose. next, i want to talk about a heart For people.

alrightz, not trying to boast here(humility) but everyone knows that i have a heart for people. and i dont really like the idea if you are "making use" of that certain person, even if i dont know the person, i dont like the idea. its like you are using someone to gain success and glorify,not God,not your friend,not anyone else, but yourself! that is a selfish idea!

if you have such a motive, it defeats the purpose of TEAMWORK. its like if you are in this team, you are the leader and you get this few people, and use them to get success in this project, and you say that THEIR work, Is ALL YOUR WORK, that is making use of them! you will not get any respect from people at all, and thus you lose people's trust.

Friends, do not misunderstand the concept of a Heart For People. in my view, a heart for people means that you see the need of God,encouragements, friends and guidance in their life and you attempt to fulfill this needs for them(not to a large extent!), like being his/her friend and just encourage him/her. but The need of God is not something you can fulfill, you can only invite the person to church and pray hard, and continue to invite him/her back. the choice is then eventually up to him/her.

hahah, thats all today, quite long right? :) haha.
things have been going on great. my life is GOOD :)

p.s. i suck at counter strike. lol

2009-03-08T06:42:00.000-07:00

hey guys! i am back to blog :D

seriously, this few days had not been the best of my days, frustrations run up on me high and i dont really like to talk to people. get freaked out easily. anger management man. :)
like, things had been happening to the people around me and i just get frustrated about them lol.
haix, seriously, i really do need help. i cant cope this man. must really seek God about his man. :)

ok, so far, physics and emaths fail. i seriously dun wan my parents to go for PTM :D HAHAHAHA

but rather, rest still ok lar, just that i dun wan end up failing for my next term+semester.

life is all about convictions man.
marcus and i had such an interesting chat. Marcus is one of the people in F23 that really impacts me. :)
this life is about convictions, and that is what my people lacks. i must be an example as a man of convictions.
this life is exciting, although it looks difficult, still it is fun :)

above all this, i am still, STILL proud to say, God, thank you for being with me.
Jan Jan came today! :) it was great man. so nice to see MSHS group really growing. as this group grows bigger, i will have to shoulder much more responsibility and Edmund, Denzel and Aaron are here to run this race with me :) yeah! i am no longer alone!(i was never alone anyway!haha, as in physically!)

trying to find ways to increase the unity of my group, and of course, as Marcus said, convictions!

hahah ok enough of serious talk, lets get back to CRAPPING! whoOOOO!!!

Aaron and Marcus never fail to amuse me! Mr Mus and Mr cle. LOL
all so vain about their new "found" muscles. hahahahahahaha!!!!
cheryl just cant understand the joke me and aaron pulled about Going teck khoon. LOL

haha if you can tell me too :)

btw, WHO LIKES POKERFACE?! ITS SUCH A NICE SONG!

haha, see ya peeps!

p.s. my new slogan "Have Faith, Time To Soar"

see ya! :D

2009-03-04T02:37:00.001-08:00

alrightzz, recieved my results today, it was kinda, WOAH. hahaha

emaths: FAILED 14/40
social studies: 20/25
chemistry: 34/50 (ONE MORE MARK TO A CRAP)
english compo: 18/30 (well, i am always writing testimonies as compo LOL)

everything seems to go upside down, maths is really HORRENDOUS.
hahah.

but above all this else, i am still happy to say, God, you are still with me, i cannot be more than thankful.

i wanna be like Pastor Lia, telling God that she's ok.
i wanna tell God that i am ok too.

today follow-up with cheryl was funny :D
flipped through her bible (can you feel the anointing?)
and saw many pictures! LOL

oh well, time to rise up.

RiSE uP

2009-03-01T21:35:00.000-08:00

hey guys! i am back to blog! hahaha
got a few GREAT songs, like insomnia. i fell in love with this song once i heard it! i might put it in the blog :D

alrightz, back to school! school has been great, trying to integrate. i feel that i am rather lonely in class, cos havent really got great friends. but, i believe that things will change when God is in their lives!

for my past few posts, i have been emphasising on unity.
without unity, there will be no group, no group, things cannot be accomplished smoothly nor efficiently. many hands make light work. i agree totally with this. i cannot stand alone in this revival. i will fall.
but God is with us, 1/2 the battle is won, the rest 1/2, is up to us now.
rise up and take this challenge guys, God is right there beside you.

my convictions were tested by God. if i had not followed my convictions, i wouldnt have been able to memorise my notes well. you see, ytd i was busy outside(with, you know what) and when i came home, i was desperate in memorising notes, with 2hrs left before my sleep curfew is reached. i was really desperate and asked God for help. suddenly, when i just read once, or twice the notes. it was planted into my mind so powerfully till today! plus, nick luo prayed with me. so, its anointing plus anointing= 2(anointing) LOL

someone should create a chrisitan calculator, that way, people will be able to "calculate" their faith back. hahahah, weird idea.

anyways, so happy to see God working in me so many times. what more things are there can unconvince God's existence? hahah

btw, i had a rush of superpoke in my facebook. apparently, i superpoked everyone. HAHAH :D

2009-02-23T01:56:00.000-08:00

watching clone wars today! it so super funny!! :D

droid: focus fire at Sector 1137464
droid2: 113... what was that again?
droid: JUST FOCUS FIRE THERE(pushing the droid1 head)

LOL

2009-02-22T05:49:00.000-08:00

hey guys!! so long yet to blog. i am really gonna CRAP ALOT today.(typical, enthu, high, high-spirited me)

that day during CG, cheryl shared about first-hand revelations keeping us going.

then i was thinking, have i recieved a first hand revelation before??

YEAH i DID!!

during my jealousy period,i was so down, devastated but when i was flipping through the bible, i saw this verse James 3:16 "For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there"

it really impacted me ALOT! i finally realised that God is trying to tell me this, and its no wonder that i felt confused, doubted, fearful! :D

today was sharing testimony. i was super scared! the whole congregation stood up and cheered for me. i was kind of like, wow.
jordan shared first! everyone was like saying, "wah jordan very cute lehx!" hahaah
nick luo next, alot of people was trying to make us giggle :D
luckily, i didnt stammer very much, sis said that i was quite good :D

whew. everything is gonna be alright!!

nicholas luo, jordan(monkey) tng, you guys owe me a picture *winks*

see ya! :D

2009-02-20T22:24:00.000-08:00

hahaha, i have yet to blog, like so late ler! :D

i am like, so quite busy, i have to study, and yet i fail my physics test. OH MANNNNNNNN!!!
oh wow. i am going to have a breakthrough, i am not gonna give up ANYTHING that is important in my life. but i will certainly ask God to help me juggle all this! :D

i must have more revelations, first handed ones :D

it will sustain my journey with God! :D

2009-02-04T06:46:00.000-08:00

thank you

for the promises you made

for the gift of life you gave

always

i will sing your praise

thank you

for the chance to live again

for your grace that never ends

always i will sing your praise

Hallelujah

my beloved King

to You i sing

thank you

for the promises you made

for the gift of life you gave

always

i will sing your praise

thank you

for the chance to live again

for your grace that never ends

always i will sing your praise

Hallelujah

my beloved King

to You i sing

You mean everything to me

You are all this world will never be

Your name reigns in my heart

You are all that i depend on.

i like this song so much. it really impacted me man.

this few days ago, it really wears me out. i seriously is STUCK with A maths man. stupid log ><

but luckily, God told me not to give up. :)

there's still so much for me to do. but God promise to carry my burdens. :) amazing

i need comfort, God is there. i need help, God is there.

just sometimes i dont grasp the help. i dont seek Him first. that's why.

another lesson learnt.

God tells me to seek His comfort first, before seeking the comfort and encouragement from man.

after all this,

Jonathan came, encourage me, loving me. wow. he is a great senior of mine. :) i hope to keep in contact with him. he is just like my big brother :D

tired now, going to sleep, mum scolding :)

bye people, going to bore myself with social studies :D

love ya lots, those who told me never to give up, and those who never gave up on me.

i will hold my umbrella today :)

~smile :)

2009-01-31T00:32:00.001-08:00

stress+boredness+spiritual downfall= want to die X(

2009-01-28T00:09:00.001-08:00

you know jealousy, the devil has really attempt to kill me with it, but i drew up my sword, to fight with him-- to the death.

my heart is pounding so super madly now, i am seriously pulling down the stronghold of jealousy in me. i am so not going to let it conquer me. never.

yet, i must admit that i am weak, in need of God.
3weeks before i see the cg once more.
3weeks before i can experience God more.

what happens if i really cry? God bottle up my every tears. woah, look at the rate my heart is going. i need spiritual advice now.

God, save me. save me. save me. SAVE ME.

do you feel like giving up sometimes? i do. i really feel like doing so, but God is telling me to hang on, people are telling me to hang on. i am telling myself to hang on. i look at my past, i never want to go back again, i am totally disgusted by it. i dont wanna return, yet, it seems that i did not proceed.

why all of a sudden i feel lonely again?

why all of a sudden, i feel that i am no longer in my spiritual family?

why all of a sudden, i feel so wrong again, although knowing that i shouldnt feel this way?

why all of a sudden, i feel, so dead?

i need answers, and help. God save me..

2009-01-26T20:13:00.000-08:00

CNY is irritating.

i miss service so much. awww T.T

2009-01-23T04:04:00.000-08:00

oh well. here i am to blog agaiN!

financial issues are seriously bugging me like MAD.
cant go out with my friends to east coast, becos of one issue: NO MONEY
freaking heck, get $500 cannot get any money out, my mum's excuse: new year alot of people, wait for next week.

seriously rolling my eyes now. O.o

this week was rather eventful. irritated Gerard BONG with my singing. come on! i was just muttering songs under my breathe, PLEASE.

after all, i still find Mr Qwayle such an engaging and hilarious person. he put seriousness, but also have fun in his lesson EVERYTIME. i never fail to laugh in his lessons. lol

he started dancing, making a fool out of joel LOL. here's the imaginary oral exam conversation.

Mr Qwayle: Come in!
(joel walks in)
Joel: good morning mr qwayle.
(mr qwayle smiles foolishly and bat his eye lids.)
Mr qwayle: well good morning!! take a seat, can i see your ic please?
(joel sits down, give an invisble ic to him, he examines the invisible ic, gave it back to him)
(joel stretches forward to take the ic)
mr qwayle: OH! it dropped(the ic)
(joel has to bend down and pick up the "ic")

LOL
its super funny sia. haha. dunno why, but music started playing in the PA system, and mr qwayle started dancing. LOL. haha :D

well, heres it. :D

2009-01-17T21:25:00.000-08:00

hey!! i am back agaiN! its been like 6days since i last blogged. HAHA!
oh mann. the sec1s aint here in my cca yet! i must really push Mrs. Roche to get them to come! must make things happen!!!

had an arguement with my parents ytd, only thing is that i didnt argue, but i talked, yes, TALKED to them, not about me, but for my sister and i. haha! they was yelling back at me lar, but i think the thing that impacted them the most is that i didnt even flare up LOL.

parents are ever so contradiciting LOL. my mum said that she didnt want us to go church so many times is becos not becos of no money lets us go, but she say that the hour spent is too long, nvr spend time at home.

but my dad, say that he cant let us go out too much becos of bus fare and money for lunch/dinner. so hilarious sia, people from the same side contradict each other. LOL

people have another wrong impression of church again. church is NOT and NEVER is just service and end-of-story. what Pastor say is right, "church build the people, not people build the church" and thus it appeals here is that there will be lessons, activities, ministries to build the people, and not just plain services, but much more! i am kind of dissapointed to hear some parent who said that he just let his son go Heart of God church for services, no lingering behind after that, not staying behind, but just go home straightaway. how dissapointing to hear that the parent is a christian too. just a believer, not a discipler?

ahhh, whatever it is, i will just surrender all. everything. to God. i know He can help me :D

Amen to that!

2009-01-11T23:51:00.001-08:00

havent been doing quiet time at all, havent been reading the bible, havent been able to praise and worship God, havent been able to just being with God for a long time, the usual time i usually spend with Him.

what's happening to me?

i look at denzel and he frequently tells me he is going to do his quiet time. and sometimes i like just see him as my past self. sometimes i treat him as a good person to follow. like he had risen far higher and above than me. i look at myself and sigh, but smiles in the end, cos i know, that God is still with me. Philippians 4:11"i am not saying this because i am in need, for i have learnt to be content whatever the circumstance"

"Now without Faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him"

i look at everyone. everyone has sped infront of me, but i am still running this race, slowly, out of breathe, but i still smile and continue smiling, cos God is still with me.

this few weeks of Spiritual tests wears me out, wavers my stand so much, till i just want to give up, everything i now have, give up christianity, give up God. i look at my past, and my present, i really cry, i dont wanna go back, but i dont know to proceed. when i am lost, i tend to cry. sometimes i ask myself: why are you so dumb?? Go seek God!!
yet, everytime i dont seek Him first. i may be a christian for so long, yet i am easy to break, and set aback. but most fortunately, i am ready, to be made ready, to wanna stand strong in my convictions, what i have been doing.

PM this sun was powerful, Galations 6:9
God is telling me, i will reap, as long as i continue to love people, do what i have been doing great.
sometimes i just deny God, and dont aline my thoughts with Him. i go off the wrong direction again by continuously think that i am not Good enough, not strong, not powerful, not matured enough.

will you this day be like me and think of giving up?
will you this day make the mistake i have once make?
will you be like me, just having a sick atittude of self-condemnaton?

The love of God triumphs it all.
The love of God.

wow.

2009-01-09T04:19:00.000-08:00

alright! i havent been blogging lately, so HERE I AM! :D

heard that leona broke his test tubes when measuring the test tube's diameter with a vernier caliper. LOL, nice one leona! :D:D:D

but Ms Lee warned us not to screw until so tight until it break, so, haha, i lucky! :D

this few days had been rather busy. and i havent been like blogging, cos i will play the com. X( tmr is cca maze. i am so gonna show off my skills. i think what i really am good am is that i can draw. i gonna draw and scan. haha.

now, i can have one more extra day i can go home early:friday.

cca extends from 2-5. woots.

when mrs. roche appoints me chairman, brian had abit of an objection. haha!

well, i am so gonna continue what i have been doing, be it creative enough or not, i believe that God has an even BETTER plan for me! :D:D:D

tata, cant blog long. i am going to have an earlier night today. feel like chatting with someone. :D hahah! i will call my "di" that is Aaron!!! CALL ME KOR! :D:D:D:D:D lol...

p.s. invited Gerard, but cant, he request next week. WOOTS. :D

2009-01-03T22:36:00.000-08:00

so sorry guys! i have left the blog dead, since i blogged in f203 blog, i was too lazy to blog here LOL.

anyway, school starts! hooray? haha. this revival is really starting man! :)

denzel was asking me"what if the group(mshs grp) grew so big till 20 people, then how ar?"

then i was like saying"then, we shall be leading this people"

he said"huh? me?"

haha. denzel have vision, just that he dun have enough faith to do it. JIA YOU. continue to build your foundation of faith in God man!

anyway, haha.20 is not enough, i was moved by God to get 50. HAHA. lol. JY man, to those who are starting a revival too. you are great and awesome! :D

OOOH i noticed sumthing.

God moved me 5 lives last year. so this year, He is moving me 10times MORE! :D

awesome. haha

i loaded this verses into my mac dashboard: Ephesians 3:20 Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly, abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us

haha, i believe, that God is able, when we are disable(sounds familiar??) haha.

JY mshs, JY See Yu Xiang, JY denzel ng, Jy Aaron, Jy edmund.

love you guys

2008-12-27T21:53:00.001-08:00

NO more running wild

i'm yours for life

well you got~ me here

LOL, i LOVE singing today, then when it came to the "got", i simply go off-wire LOL

anyway, this is not the purpose of my post today(not about going off) but its about the meaning of the lyrics, which Pastor Lia had so kindly explained i get VERY impacted of.

hi-five marcus, i received a revelations yesterday.

i have been very emotionally-led, jealousy, anger, sadness, blah... it has been making me very wild

when i have been very emo, i will just sit there and dont talk. when i am angry, my voice become noticeably LOW and solemn. when i am jealous, i become monotonous and shrugs alot, trying to hide the feeling. when i am happy, i CRAP. when i am sad,(the good thing) i seek God! :)

so, cannot let this affect my daily attitude of my life, or to affect the people around me.

i cant imagine, if i am still so emotionally unstable, and i use it to affect people, then the whole CG is like this, wah... poor cheryl. luckily, i have a great spiritual family to support me, to push me forward, to encourage me, teach me. and i certainly hope that i will have a heart to listen and to accept this teachings too! :D

anyway, i certainly aint going to let emotions to guide me. but i will be guided by the Holy Spirit, a spirit of love, mercy and grace on me forever. i am thankful. and i MUST appreciate today.

p.s. pardon me for pushing you guys too much ><

2008-12-25T21:29:00.000-08:00

Aaron never fail to make me laugh! :D

he and i click alot! HAHA
Aaron said this, "MEEHHHHHRRY CHRISTMAS SELAMAT"
those who went for christamas service should know what this means! :D

and all the sheep say"meeehhhh"
getting lost not equal to running away. :D

you get my laughter going man Aaron! :D

2008-12-25T03:49:00.000-08:00

today is christmas, yet i am very sad.
i spend this christmas with my family, my spritual family, those who were there: Leona, Cheryl, Jordan, Nicholas, JT, Jedric.
i love them so much. they are so close to me. thinking of leaving them until a very long time later is sad. during the way home on the bus. i cried. i tried holding my tears. although this week there's still another opporturnity, i still dont know if i can come. God presence just dawned on me. He told me,"have a little more faith in me".

yea, faith. i should have faith in God, but i just cant stop myself in feeling such sorrow. i told myself, i will come back, but i jus keep feeling very sad. thinking of not seeing them so soon. thinking of not coming back home, spending time with my spiritual family so soon. i just cant hold back my tears.

i need more faith.

2008-12-23T01:15:00.000-08:00

marcus, you lost to this --- WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME JUDGING YOU WHEN YOU JUDGED ME !

:D

2008-12-23T00:29:00.001-08:00

The God i know my tower of refuge

wow. i really love this song, i am almost to listening to it like, everyday.
in this song, there is two verse that really impact me.
it is : the God i know my tower of refuge.
the God i know, strengthens the weak.

this two verse sort of link together, God is really impacting me with this song, not just only becos it is nice to listen(which is quite true) but this two verse really impact me alot. God is really challenging me to come to Him, everytime, no matter what happens, i must really come to Him. i think God is super smart. he is really dropping hints to me, telling me that i must come to Him, FIRST. no matter what happens. Him FIRST.
plus, God is telling me that i am not weak, becos, i am able to be strong, cos He is willing to strengthen me. somewhere in proverbs, its says "let the weak say "i am strong" "
God really wants me to grow. one thing i have learnt through my christian walk, and i keep emphasising this, God is NOT a sadist. He does not put us into misery, or in problems for laughter, but He put this problems in our way, to STRENGTHEN us, to want us to come back to our TOWER OF REFUGE, which is HIM! :D

right now, this song is really what i need. although PO is so strong against me, God is telling me that He WILL STRENGTHEN me, but i must frequently RUN TO MY TOWER OF REFUGE.
cos, if i dont even run to Him, and persevere, it wont help and might even cause me to fall even stronger, this will just cause my faith to leak. doubt and fear to come in.

actually, to be true, i dont expect myself to write so much, but, i think its fun, cos i can come up with alot of logic for myself and inferring what God wants to tell me. COOL :D

see ya tmr guys! i believe that we will breakthrough 1000 youths, 1400 church-wide. :)
F23 will grow, and i will grow, but i must always rmb, come back to God!! :D

2008-12-21T04:46:00.000-08:00

My Chains are gone
i've been set free
my God my saviour
has ransomed me
and like a flood
His mercy reigns
unending love
amazing grace

wow. you can say, today's post is really something, that is very, well, not sad, but something that i wanna drop my tears of, something that really touched my heart.

i have like invited 7 lifes, and 5lifes was saved, amongst them, one is still unsure, but we are still gonna have faith amen?

:D i have seen so many lifes, so many lifes really need God, yet they still dont recognise Him, dont wanna accept him, they really, really need God.

i love you Father. i so love Him. what he say is true, the harvest is ripe.
i must be the fishers of men. this revival, is in my hands. be it if someone started it or not, i believe that i will continue it. God is with me. i am so gonna accept discipleship with seriousness, not self-condemnation. accept teachings, cos my CGL and my fellow spiritual brothers loves me.

i love you guys too man, just to tell you guys something, i never is too shy

I LOVE YOU F23 I LOVE YOU GUYS! :)

2008-12-17T22:01:00.000-08:00

alright! i am so gonna blog now! :D

LIFE IS GREAT! now, i really am trying SUPER hard to get people to come this sat and christmas service, my contact invites are nearly out -.- DENZEL AND EDMUND! Get your people!!! Hahah!!!! :D

and lets clap our hands and congratulate my mum for striking $500 for her lottery yesterday -.-

like, how much she can win to pay back the previous lottery tickets she had bought which had no won. the devil is really inducing her to buy more. -.- must stop this culture!

ok, haha. i really have a powerful feeling to tell you guys the GREAT things about the MSHS people i have brought, but it seems judgemental. they are still so young. but they are really going into spiritual maturity. cheers! like what it says in the bible, at Hebrews(that's the farthest i can rmb) it says that we start by drinking milk, for basics, then bread, then meat! :D

but i believe, my friends, my spiritual brothers, they are so gonna rise up, i believe. Aaron, on such hunger and on-fireness to know God, he's amazing. Denzel, hungry to know God, trying to change for God, trying to live for God, wanting to rise up, wanting to do this revival with me. Wow. Edmund, making a real effort to come to God, to want to do this revival, to bring friends. wow.

my friends, my spiritual brothers, they are so gonna rise up. i can see it now.

i am so gonna make an impact in this school, no matter what is restricting me, i will never restrict myself. aint no mountain is too big for me no God. cos God is in me.

2008-12-13T23:42:00.000-08:00

hoooorrrrayyyy!!! this is the 100th post! :)
wow, its like one year since i created this blog liaox.

but, happy 100birthday!(no link sia)-.-

Aaron recieved tongues! Ivan, Chun Kit, and i prayed for him during prayer meeting, and he recieved it! :D wow,wow super wow.

right now, i just hope that i can get a black formal shirt, so that when i pass bmta, go usher, i dont have to worry liaox. LETS PRAY! :D

Nick, you taught me this: Sho Ko Rah Bah Kan Dey, Shi Ki Yi Ya Lar Rah Bah Kan Dey

LOL thanks nick :) distinction for AMT seh, my sis got merit! :D hooray!

2008-12-13T18:14:00.000-08:00

HEY GUYS!! here is some great news to show you! :D it is CERTAINLY GREAT!

the vision of my year is complete! :) i had led five lives to God and they were SAVED by God's amaing grace! :)

now, i must have a new vision! :D
i promised God this: i will get 50 lives to Him, plus, they will want to accept God into their lives.
it is BIG, but IDEALISTIC!

i think, the greatest thing i heard denzel spoke to me in my whole life(yes,literally) is "lets do this revival together man!"

WOW.

i am so gonna rise up, denzel is rising up, edmun will rise up.

one thing know i have to deal with : my emotions
my emotions are SUPER swingy. they can cause me to change me inside out, and make my world upside down(wow! poetry!).
Jealousy, the weakness in me the devil tries to attack me with. i am so not gonna let him win. i dunno know why, but when i was talking to nick that i had this feeling, i felt helpless, and wanna cry, got abit agitated. He was like "are you ok??" then i was, "yeah"
but after he hang up, a few tears came out, and i came running back to God.
His presence was powerful as "Be Exalted" was played, peace, no more jealousy, sadness, i felt joy.
before this happened, i was like, happy, undisturbed, but once after denzel talked to me on the phone, and my mum constant nagging, jealousy and rage just sparked.

God's presence is great

i am so not gonna lose to you devil

i am so going to breakthrough

watch me

2008-12-11T22:16:00.000-08:00

you have filled this heart of mine
with your grace and love divine
i can't help but worship you

you have filled this space between
all my hopes and all my dreams
i'm so thankful that you came for me

so this is my prayer today...

okok. i am so not gonna type the whole song out :P

I CAN GO FOR CHRISTMAS SERVICE! TWO DAYS SUMMORE! :D yeah! :)

hahaa, slowly, breaking through! :D

i counted, there is seven new integrations i brought so far, four got saved, three of them regulars and one new christian! :D

there is like: Hong Yang(saved!). Aaron(saved!). Edmund(saved!). Denzel(saved!), shawn, Yan Zhao, Tay Han, Xiang Le

wow, i promised God five lives to Him. here i go! :D

I DUN WANNA GEL MY HAIR!!!! xD

2008-12-11T00:28:00.000-08:00

HEY!! i am posting some of my previous art works today! :D

this is my view of heaven! LOLOLOLOL

made a sword design, got a few inspirations

heheh! took this idea from dark magician!

just, a normal knight?

this was my best artwork yet! :D its for my art exam, gt 76 for it! :)

another inspiration...

concept idea for my sa2 exam...

Clothes concept idea for sa2 too...

and there it is! :D haha. its fun compiling my art ideas together :D

SEE YA! :D

2008-12-09T23:52:00.000-08:00

alright!! i am posting again! haha

A LIFE WAS SAVED!! HALLEJUAH!

haha, hong yang was touched by the love of God and was saved last sunday! i promised God to get him 5 ppl, and now, four people are saved. left one more! JYJY!! :D

this few days, i really, really hate parental objection to the very core. i cant go for ops general training becos my mum dun let. ARGHH!!! parental objection! i am so gonna break free.

i am still, STILL fighting to go for christmas service

i have been thinking alot, why had God put me into this? i slowly, slowly found the answer.

Appreciative:
appreciate the chance to attend service,cg, outings, no to take it for granted.
such as when any events, or even laziness comes, i wont think that missing one day is okok de.

Strength;
God is refining my strength that i would want to grow into spiritual maturity, to want to grow stronger that my parents will see the change and let me go. he is using this that i may be motivated to refine myself with constant doing of spiritual habits.

Testimony:
after breaking through, i can prove to people that parental objection CAN be broken through! let people have hope and faith that it will happen!

Love:
it will enhance my love and dependency on God, that i will slowly have an unlawful hunger to want to seek him, to love him, appreciate him.

wow. i believe there is much more! :D

see ya! :D

2008-12-06T01:55:00.000-08:00

HEY!!! i have managed to speak in tounges! i have been finally baptised by the holy spirit!

yeah! :D

alright, today, God just talked to me, and spoke sumthing really powerful to me. he said this ...

"go and talk to your father today about your views to want to come church. do not be afraid to speak, for you do not speak alone, but you speak with the Holy Spirit" WOW!

then i just told my father my views, and he told me that he allowed me to go, but its just my mum, and he dont wanna quarrel with my mom over this issue.

i have won my father, now is my mother! :D

2008-12-03T22:43:00.000-08:00

hey!!!! i saw this on fedora blog and i am already dying of laughter! its about my sis! HAHAHA

TIPS ON HOW TO BE A BIMBO
By See Ting Wei
Quote 1:"When it's raining, everyone should go home!'
(dont ask me why, i dont know either =/)

Quote 2:"To avoid getting stuck in crowds, you should stand still and wait for everyone to walk past you!"(hmm..i wonder how long that will take?)

Quote 3:"When you fall on the escalator, a mere "whoa" or "ah" is not enough. Say a very loud "WHOOOOO" and then complain about how bad your shoes are!"(you have no idea how embarassing this was...)

Quote 4:" BIM-BWOH is the real way to say Bimbo!"

HAHAHAHAHAHA :D so funny!!! :) when my sis told me the real version, i shouted out laughingLOL

2008-12-03T03:49:00.003-08:00

have some great and exciting pictures i have taken today! heres...

heres a very "cute" photo of me, and my sis! apparently, my mum wants to steal the limelight!

^_^

this is a better photo i think! haha, just that i shifted my mum face away ^^

i told my sis to act emo , in the end she act dreamy LOL, guess who she is dreaming of! :)

now, here is i act dreamy, she act emo, LOL
this is an artistic picture!! LOL, you are seeing double! :D

okok, me bad. i wanted to do some photoshop stuff, but ended blogging instead!!

i actually wanted to post about my sis and i today!

my sis is a great sis! (i tell you ar, if she see this post today, she will be like, "GOSH!")

haha. she has been like the spiritual guider in my life, without her, i wouldnt have known God, i wouldnt have been dragged out from my "awesome"(notice the sarcasm) past!

b4 me and my sister get to know Christ, we were always, fighting. LOL i still can rmb that the tactic that she always use against me is scratching me. LOL, or she will use bombarstic words until i got nothing to say, i must say, she always "win" me in fights LOL

it is like when she is sec3, she get to know God, she was saved, she got me saved that our relationship slowly get to grew better! :D

haha. today, i think me and my sis was being very funny!! if you were there, i promise you you will laugh!

i was planning to cook 2 pieces of omelette, and guess wat, i am like, struggling. LOL

the pot was VERY sticky, and i was like, scraping the egg away, so first one, FAILED! :(

second one, seems very nice, and i took CAUTION now, just making the oil hot first so that i wont be sticky, YET still, it stick, BUT b4 that, i throw the egg in, and SPLASH! the oil was like "Piang""Piang" then me and my sis just backed off, and i shouted "turn the fire down!" then she shouted, "you turn!!" i am like, WALAO! so i used the lid as shield and turned it down! HAHAHAHA! in the end, the egg, was like completed by my sis, and it turned frm an omellette to a scrambled eggs! LOL

haha, we had a great time, the pot nearly fell to the floor. i must say, we are the best cooks around LOL!

see ya, btw LOVE YA LOT SIS!

2008-11-30T22:47:00.000-08:00

kkk...Marcus, you wanted me to do this, so here i go...

1)The person who tagged : MARCUS!!
2)Your relationship with him/her : ERHEM!! we are guys -.- what can you expect. FRIENDS LAR!
3)Your impression of him/her : well, my response is the same as jordan XD
4)The most memorable thing he/she has done for you : hmmm... poking me with his keys?
5)The most memorable thing he/she has said to you : None Of Your Business
6)If he/she becomes your lover, you will : well. i doubt it will happen ><
7)If he/she becomes your lover, thing he/she has to improve on will be : POKE ME MORE
8)if he/she becomes your enemy, you will : poke him with MY keys
9)If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be : constant poking
10)The most desired thing you want to do for him/her now is : steal his keys
11)Your overall impression of him/her : GO BACK QUESTION 3
12)How do you think people around you will feel about you : eh, i not insecure lehx... i think, they will say i am CUTE! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
13)The characteristic(s) that you love about yourself are : well, God says that i have a heart for people!
14)On the contrary, you hate about yourself are:NO, i LOVE every part of me, cos God LOVES every part of me!
15)The most ideal person you want to be is : PASTOR HOW!
16)For people who cares about and likes you, you say something to them : I LOVE YOU! and those who hate me. I LOVE YOU TOO! :D
17) pass this quiz to 10 of your friends:
1. Ting Wei (my sis)
2. Cheryl!
3.Jordan!
4.Marcus!(back to you!)
5. Leona!
6. Nicholas!
7. Caleb !
8. Jedric!
9. denzel!
10. edmund!
18)Who is number 6 having a relationship with? LOL NICK HAVING A RELATIONSHIP? maybe yeah, with the REST!!
19)Is number 9 a male or female? -.- see for yourself
20)If 7 & 10 are together, will it be a good thing? they dont even know each other!
21)what is no.2 studying about? i am not very sure, she tell me today she have a law project. then she talk about shakespeare, makes me confused...
22)When was the last time you had a chat with number 3?erm... yesterday? i smsed him at like 12am?
23)What kind of music band does number 8 like? heh, i come back to you again?
24)Does number 1 have any siblings? -.- i said that she was my sister...
25)Will you woo number 3? OMG. me wooing Jordan? we are already in a relationship! :) HAHA
26)How about number 7? ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
27)Is number 4 single? no, he is attached to like, 2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9.
28)What is surname of number 5? OOPS
29)What is hobby of number 4? fiddling with his key
30)Does number 5 & number 9 get along? er... they dun talk to much, but yeah.
31)where is number 2 studying at? sianxx.... this quiz proves how much i know about my cgl -.-
32)Share something casual about number 1? YOU ARE MY BEST SISTER! (is that casual enough?)
33)Have you tried developing feelings for number 8? LOL, WE ARE FRIENDS
34)Where does number 9 live at? Thomas road 700 LOL
35)What colour does number 3 like? OH MAN! :(
36)Are number 5 & number 1 best friends? not really, but number 1 keep saying that number 5 is cute. LOL
37)Does number 1 have any pets? NOPE, my mum HATE pets
38)Is number 7th sexiest person in the world? what a qns to ask
39)What is number 10 doing now? using the com, as usual, typical

2008-11-29T02:25:00.000-08:00

i am literally blogging with my new MAC!!!!!!!!!! :D

all thanks to the contract with singnet, i managed to get this new macbook and is blogging with it now!

haha. today, Cheryl prayed for me!!!! :) i am like trembling like mad, not of the coldness, but of the presence of God! totally, trembling! , though the feeling of constant trembing aint nice, but i till enjoyed it anyhow, cos, ITS THE PRESENCE OF GOD!!

i cant wait to start follow-up with cheryl soon! i really wanna recieve tounges for like along time ler, just that dun have the chance. parental objection, I WILL BREAKTHROUGH!

How said, i wont lose to you devil!

how nice, God gave me a vision, i am going to help bringing a revival to MSHS, TO MY HOME vision, its what keeps me going! :)

today, God told me this: " don't be unhappy anymore my son, you are my son, whom i am well pleased", i was like "is that you Lord? thank you, for being by my side" and my face changed expression, to wanna cry, but i didnt haha. Help me, cos all i need is YOU!! :)

2008-11-27T00:01:00.000-08:00

B4!!!!! i sort of miss B4, miss samantha!! but now, i am in F23!!! :) God just want me to move on into a condition that is suitable for me! i will always rmb B4, rmb Nelson, Darren, Hannah, SAMANTHA!!!! :D

let's move on F23!! :)

2008-11-26T23:51:00.000-08:00

so much has happened, and i really wanna cry, but my eyes just dont produce tears all of a sudden when i need it. haha

i am so thankful that God is here to be with me. what could be even better than this?

Philippians 4:11 "I am not saying this because i am in need, for i have learnt to be content in whatever the circumstance"

Jy See Yu Xiang! :) keep that fire blowing.

2008-11-22T18:48:00.000-08:00

oHHHH, so much had happened just this week!!! how am i suppose to tell them all?? haha!!

ok. lets say sumthing that had impacted me alot.
this friday, my mother and i went and visited my grandfather at the old nursing home. when i heard that my grandmother had first sent him there, i was so super sad and angry. my grandfather provided the growth for the whole family of 9members, and she treated him this way, finding him a bother. i heard from my mother that they had nt fell in love at all, they just met each other once, the status of each family is good, and they get married, without any feelings between each other at all!! :( this kind of marriage, I DONT WANT!

i went into the room he was staying, and the first thing i saw impacted me. he was sitting on the bed, staring out at the window, asif he is really so bored and nothing to die except to await for death to befall on him! i was sooooo super sad by this, and felt even more disgusted. this made me wanting to treat my parents better!!!

THANKS FOR THE BIBLE GUYS!!! i really loved it! daryl loves B4 and F23!!

2008-11-20T17:33:00.000-08:00

i am an idiot.

(what a way to start!)

it's like, i always call in the WRONG timing?! whenever i call sumbody, they always end up with something to do. how i hope that i can call them at the RIGHT time!!!!!!!!!!

haha. luckily, there is this person who doesnt need a call to reach, who is just here for me, and i just need to call out to Him! guess who is He??? haha, i think you SHOULD know!

sorry nick! call you while you were sleeping!!! haha

and the sad thing is this, a choco chip just fellllll into the gap of my keyboard, now cant even get it out. groossss.

oh yah! must tell you this great blessing i received from God last year! i received a Samsung yp-u3 mp3 player last year! my first ever mp3 player! i took the chance to put as many worship and praise songs inside and guess what? now when i am sad or angry and in need of God's presence, i just listen to the song, on up to 22volume(which is rather high) and just FLOW with the music and the thoughts will just go away! :)

how great is our God!

2008-11-18T00:44:00.001-08:00

OKOK!! I change my mind, I decided to blog!! Here goes…

This few days, a lot have been really happening to me and I was quite impacted. Maybe it’s God’s work!! This few events really changed me quite a lot. Haha!!

FIRST EVENT!!!
Insecurity ATTACK!! I had been most powerfully attacked by the devil of insecurity, luckily I was dragged out of it quickly. Haha. I sought help from God and Jordan, luckily, I was dragged out. My sister told me that I have to press on to God’s presence when this things happen and to really pray and ask Him for help and to rmb Him first haha.
I was like LITERALLY shivering and wanted to cry when talking to Jordan about it. Don’t ask me why, cos I don’t even know why either LOL.

SECOND EVENT!!!
My friend had been insecure and did not recognize God nor sought help when he needs them and is at a lost of what to do. LUCKILY, I managed to persuade him to tell someone about it, ESPECIALLY God.(although It took me 2days to persuade him)
It really teaches me that I couldn’t depend on my own human and fleshly self and refuse to seek help although we need them. It makes me have more experience too when more of this things happen on someone else, or even myself! At least I know how to handle this situation! J

THIRD EVENT!!
God spoke to me!!! Haha, AMAZING! Me and my sister was doing our qt together and we were listening to God, we both heard the same verse!! It says,” you are my son whom I am well pleased” WOW, God is really pleased with us! J

FOURTH EVENT!!!
I have been rather hasty, I think my cg will know. Haha
It really teaches me to be taking steps slowly, not hastily in friendship related stuff. I also had learnt in from the relationship between me and God too! My spiritual walk with God wasn’t a big BANG then became good. But it took me 1 year that I had became a much more mature Christian now, stronger in my prayer life and becoming to hunger to seek God and being in good terms, wanting to serve him and be with him. This takes a year to accomplish, looks like, some things REALLY do takes TIME!! J

Have a great day ahead!! Have fun lol!

2008-11-18T00:19:00.000-08:00

HEY!!! we should watch this vid mannn!! my cg should know what it is about, UNLESS YOU WERENT THERE!!!

haha. i think cheryl's voice was the loudest :P haha!!!

~~~

i havent been blogging for like quite a long time ler!!! :)

i wanna go BMT(A)!! all becos of this irritating PO, KILL YOU PO!!! :)

haha. cant talk to much... haha. I WANNA GO BMT(A) and no one can stop me!!

2008-11-10T22:48:00.000-08:00

i was thinking of a spiritual post today! so here i go!

i cant bother i take out my USB, >< haha. well, i just say it without the pictures then! :)

so, i was just looking at some portraits of paint at the artroom.(well, i had just been in school) haha

and i saw i got 20/20 for my group's painting!(sorry, out of point!)

anyway. so iwas thinking of writing this, it was qutie an inspiration.
i was looking, wow, some people can really Paint, some can really create Art!
so this is the point of my post today: who is the Art in your life?
Art: to me, is just a design, sometimes it may not be beautiful, but it is significant to the artist, and cetainly mean alot.

God is an artpiece i would like to have.He is so beautifully and powerfully and handsomely pictured(not literally). His grace and love make Him like an unique artpiece that everyone would like to claim ownership of! although we may not see Him, nor touched Hm finger to finger before, we can easily picture Him. His amazing grace and amazing love tells all that we have to "see" about Him!

but, there is another great artpiece in this world, that God claims ownership of. and yes, it is found in the previous sentence. THE WORLD!
God is like our artist, and we are all fearfully and wonderfully made by Him! like an artist, who wouldn't want to make his work perfect? thus, we are all fearfully and wonderfully made! and of course, as said, the artwork is somewhat significant to himself. and YES, we are made in the IMAGE of God! we MEAN something to God, we are significant To Him! :)

we are all portraits of God that He will so proudly declare that we are His beautiful work, however, some people would just in the end maimed God's work. however, we can repainted by God, but painting scars however leaves behind. Still, we would be admired by people, cause we are made beautiful, Are REDEEMED(Like what Pastor Kong said) aGAIN! :)

i dont know if this post make sense to you. but i am just saying what comes to me. like how God asks you to do something? i dont know... HAHA! :)

2008-11-09T04:57:00.000-08:00

I HATE THIS just REALLY desperately wanting to blog about some great and inspirational stuff, but just CANT! :(

and anyway, i feel that my blog like no life de... no one tags, no one come see. well, maybe i dont know whether ppl got see without tagging, BUT I REALLY WANNA SEE TAGGERS >< T.T

for the first time in my life, God's presence was so strong today, really felt very impacted and I SANG(like shouted) very LOUD! :) it had been my greatest dream to become a worshipper, up on the stage to sing and worship. i really wanna try ><

my sister told me that i have to go through SOW, and have auditions, then the audition judge is ROY! wah... SIANx...
besides, being a worshipper needs to have alot of commitment, PLUS, must have the power to pull God's presence down.

i am starting to doubt my dreams, haha. i really wanna serve God, i really wanna do great things for Him. although being a worshipper is my dream, i dont even know whether if it is twhat he want me to be, although i had been praying and asking...

tmr have to go back school. designing my cca's notice board... seems quite a tedious job. ah.... no choice, cos dma is pulled out from mits completely. YEAH

i see a near revival, stirring as we pray and seek. we are on our knees, we are on our knees.

:) i gonna shine his light.

2008-11-06T21:13:00.001-08:00

http://lifewithoutlimbs.org/news_details.php?newsID=168

GOGOGOGOGO VISIT THIS ALL HEART OF GOD CHURCH MEMBERS!!! you will be surprised! amen!

2008-11-06T17:42:00.000-08:00

was blogging, yet again...
i am so totally bored, how long has it been for me to post something spiritual? haha

i have been doing some memory work on some well-informed and GREAT verses!

hebrews 11:1 "Now faith is being certain of whatwe hope for and believing in what we do not see"

YEAH! i am writing this without a bible. if there is any error, PLEASE tell me!
i am using NIV version of the bible btw...

and, Philippians 4:11 " i am not saying this because i am in need, for i have learnt to be content in whatever circumstance"

haha, i guess some of you might find these verses familiar...
and... i forgot the chapter and verse, but it is somewhere in John...
"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in him will not perish but have eternal life."

the "will not" and "shall not" i got it mixed up, so i wrote will. am i right?!

i was watching Yugioh gx, episode 177. i think its rather stupid in the way Darkness claims himself to be the saviour of the world when he himself is about to destroy and take away every life in the world. he explains some theory about duel monster cards... saying that we gave him strength because we hate or disbelieved in our cards and did not treat them well. SERIOUSLY...

sorry, but we ARE NOT living in the world of duel monster, ITS JUST A GAME. LOL

but, WE HAVE A SAVIOUR!! AMEN!
and our saviour is so much greater, through His great grace, love and mercy shown upon us all!
wow...

Jordan Tang, i am gonna get you mann!
and, those who had been going into s2, PLEASE TELL ME. at least let me know that i am not alone ><
haha

OMGosh! subject combinatioN!

2008-11-05T22:46:00.000-08:00

today i received my subject combi, guess what stream i got into?

haha, i got in to s2. for those who dont know what it means, it's a triple science class. AWWWW ><

i dont know whether this is good, or not. haha. i only know a few going s2, but we still dont know which class we going to anyway.
i GOTTA hit the books mannn... WHEN SCHOOL REOPENS I AM SO GONNA DIE.
i hope that studies wont make neglect God. i must grow both spiritually and academically. of course, spiritual is first!

wow, holidays like so BIG but so BORING... i wanna go out like SOOOO much. i cant stand myself staring at the computer screen and doing crap stuff without fruitfullness each day. like, you are being controlled by the com, not the other way round.

NO GOOD TV SHOWS TO WATCH EITHER... Heroes season three is still broadcasting in NBC i think, and its gonna take a looooooong time to come to channel 5, zzz

i am so gonna warcraft. haha.

hear this! God is able, godisable. lol get the picture? those who went yesterday, SHOULD KNOW! haha :D

and anyway, my friends are coming back this sat from China, MORE NEW FRIENDS TO INVITE!!!!!!!!! :)

BYE!

2008-11-02T05:08:00.000-08:00

here i am LOL

today was warcrafting with jordan, which IN THE END WE LOST because my com hanged and it dc...

poor thing lehx me! have to handle FOUR heroes at one go when my teammate just quitted...
SIAN

haha, i am like SLEPT THREE times today. seriously, i am dying of boredom...

hunger, unlawful hunger. sometimes it seems that the faith and fire is slackened abit, but luckily i still hang on. i can still remember that time where i cannot feel God's presence and my quiet time just crash on me. and i still remember that when me and my sister did our quiet time together one day, i just cried in front of her. it just seems that God is like revealing so much to me. he really wants me back. and i am overwhelmed by my emotions, like all my complicated emotions have all turned away. and like i am set free AGAIN!

haha, quite dramatic. this happened this year, a few months ago. haha

i cant wait to go back again T.T
i sort of miss it.

haha, yesterday's wedding ceremony was fun. but i think the dishes are quite ok. i ate the shark fins with a guilty conscience. HAHAHAHAAHA

bye, and CYA!

THANKS!

2008-10-28T00:06:00.000-07:00

HEY GUYS!! Here I am to blog AGAIN!!

Today’s post is gonna be special and looooooong
Its THANKSGIVING POST!!

For a start, I like to thank GOD!!!

Thank you God for always being by my side 24/7, although knowing that I couldn’t fill this whole page for the great things I want to thank you and the things that you have done for me, I really is appreciative and is thankful for being there for me, and forgiving me of my past and of my sins, thank you Lord, for giving me the following people to thank to! Becos, ultimately, it is You who created them to guide and lead me!

Next, MY SISTER!!!
Thank sis for always being there to guide me and advice me of the things when I am confused or misguided, and most thankfully, I thank God that you are saved! If not, I would not have been saved either! It is through God and through you that I got saved!! Thank you sis for always sharing your experiences to me whenever I need them, and thank you for being a great sister!! Lets grow together man! Amen!

Next, SAMANTHA!!

Thanks Samantha! Thank you for being my leader last year and also sharing with me advices and a lot of things that I couldn’t have solved it myself. Thank you for being such a great CGL to me last time!! THANK YOU MAN!!!

Next, CHERYL!

THANKS CHERYL!! For being my present CGL, although we hadn’t really known each other very very well yet, but I still thank you for being my CGL and helping me whenever I need help and advices! Thanks!

Next, Denzel!

THANKS DENZEL! Whenever I need joy and comfort, you will never fail to make me laugh. You have been a great friend, but now, you are my great spiritual brother! Let’s walk this walk with God together man!

Next, CG!

THANK GUYS! For being a nice and welcoming CG haha! I still can remember the first day I met Jordan. LOL. I hope to spend more time with you guys and grow with you guys man!!! J

Wow, I thanked so many people alr! J most importantly, I think God is the person I need to be most thankful of, he had been impacting me, refine me, comforting me, strengthening me, and loving me for a loooooong time. I wish to spend the rest of my life with Him.

Heal my heart and make it clean, and also break my heart for what breaks yours, Father.

Dwell in me this day.

2008-10-26T06:05:00.000-07:00

HEYHEYHEY!!! i am here yet again, i tink i am really updateful since i have so much free time now...

i am like seeing all my friends really bring me sorrow, something just keep telling me, i am not going to see them agian...

i was like thinking, is getting good results a good matter? when i get good results, i end up going to a good, yet with nobody-i-know-class.also, people keep giving me that "wa, you good lar" kind of language, which angers me although they were simply joking. it just feel kind of uneasy.

whatever it is, i am not going to be INSECURE!! NEVER!

haha, my sis is about to show nick vujicic video to my cousins, cos we are at grandma hse, as usual.

i am gonna miss you guys for 2 weeks man, although i cant come, i believe i will come soon! :)( i think you know who you are guys!!! i will try coming!)

i am going to get myself a bible, I MUST!!! :) having a determination is Good!~~~

lol

i was thinking, is dota that fun? LOL
somewhat, i prefer warcraft. LOL

see ya!!
70 more days to boredom, 70 more days to look forward to.
contradictory... BYE!!

see ya denzel!

2008-10-25T02:05:00.000-07:00

hi! its been quite a long time since i last posted eh? haha

yesterday was A FUN barbaeque at denzel's house! but tell you all something funny, we couldnt start the fire at all!!!!! we attempted like for 5hrs, but to no avail T.T
wasted all the charcoal and fire starter, in the end, we have to bother denzel's mum to fry and microwave the food, which turn out to be quite nice too! :P

just some pictures to share with you...

well, abit unfit for the size... alot of people, well including me, became 5year old yesterday...

anyway, just to show you some BEFORE and AFTER stuff i took...

this is before...

and after, which we still dun have the fire =.=

we were playing blind mice, dueling like mad, psping like mad... moreover, ITS FUN!!!

mr and mrs dhar came ALSO!! they came quite late, which is like almost everybody go home ler so no fun de ><

haha, si cong very scared that mrs dhar will scold him, find out from him if you wanna know why. haha

i think chong jie is really a very nice guy, i dont know which stream he chooses, but i can feel that he is not a bad person, its just that he is really trying hard to fit in.

ok gotta go!!!

HANG ON, I STILL HAVENT LET YOU ALL SEE ONE IMPORTANT PICTURE!!!!

my sister commented that i seemed to look the youngest amongst them. haha, HEY I AM STILL YOUNG ^^^^^^^^^^

happy birthday denzel, and have a safe and fruitful and fun trip to China!! see ya real soon

i wanna try and be a great friend.

Happy Birthday to MEEEE!!! ^^

2008-10-20T05:23:00.000-07:00

yeah! 20th october, MY BIRTHDAY!! whoo hooo!!
just some pictures to share with you...

MY BIRTHDAY CAKE YEAH MAN!! lol
celebrated my birthday yesterday with my family from my maternal side! haha

and...

some great guys celebrated my birthday with me too!! can you guess who are they? haha
but, THANKS SO MUCH GUYS!!! YOU ARE SOOOOOO SWEET ^^

but i have just passed a very eventful birthday today: serving people!
me and my class and antoher calss went zoo today, and we just served by being tour guides to old folks from stjohns old folks home to visit the zoo. althoug ha bit of a communication barrier between my group and the old lady(whom i asked and replied that he is 90 years old), since she does not knows how to speak english nor chinese and only knows how to speak teochew, which LUCKILY, i managed to agar-agar talk to her, haha.
i am really happy that the old lady commeneded and thanks me for keeping to offer her a mineral water drink, which she keeps rejecting for fear of inconvenience of going to the toilet. she gives me a thumbs up for speaking RATHER well teochew. LOL

haha. what greater birthday is greater than this, TO SERVE!

but i am quite dissapointed though, cos some of my classmates just feels reluctant to serve, and to help out. but overall, i think we DID A GREAT JOB!!

finally, i took a photo of the cards that i made for my class. haix, my last batch of cards for my friends, haha.

but well, i have already walked through so many, seen so many, yet, it seems as though i know so little, and need to see much more and go through much more!

i see one of my classmate tore uo my card and threw it on the floor in front of me, although sad, i wont be insecure, this is one covenant to God i cannot break. haha.

thank God for the greatest blessing He has given me: Himself.

God, Jesus, Holy Spirit, you are my best friend, LOVE YOU THE BEST!! :)

determination, conviction

2008-10-16T23:49:00.001-07:00

i have a determination!

haha

i have a great time talking to fedora today. haha. since samantha is busy, i asked fedora instead. sounds wrong, but it was quite urgent and an emergency. haha

denzel going to cg today, i hope that God, me, and many mroe people shall continue to impact him. haha
it takes time to convince i think, i am feeling that i am rushing abit too fast, might end up making him to think that i am forcing hi,. i dont wanna make the same mistake again...
fedora said that i should just casually and just talk about God in a casual matter, and not asif like just releasing facts, facts and facts, but telling him about miracles God had done for me, just applying God into our daily lifes. haha.

insecurity and undecisiveness is really and irritating thing that will really waver a person if they were to decide whether they should want to choose God in to their lives, or to select christianity as their religion. haix...

i am wondering myself, am i that insecure and full of doubt myself last time? haha, YES, i am really seeing myself, maybe not much, but i have been rather doubtful, and faithless at first. it takes time. haha. AND I KNOW IT MYSELF ><

whatever it is, I AM DETERMINED!

2008-10-14T00:22:00.001-07:00

It is rather weird for me to blog for three consecutive days ><....

Haha, cos I really have LOTS of stuff to tell you guys today! If I can bother to list them all out today >< haha…

You know, I have been quite worried this few days for my examinations results, and FINALLY, it is REVEALED!! Amen!!

Most thankfully, and through God’s grace, I managed to GET a not bad result! YEAHHH!!!

Managed to A my science, maths, Chinese, art and literature and geography…. YES!!

My English, well, most pathetically, PASSED. YEAH YEAH!!! ^^ I am so proud, LOL
Haha.

I AM POWERFULLY impacted by God and I am really thankful for him to bless me and allowed me to ace through this!!
He taught me a very good thing today, HUMILITY.
I really want to be a good Christian, one that humbles himself, even before men. I have been proud, maybe arrogant, rather sinful you see. And I really dislike myself this way, it makes me really gross. Haha. I WILL GROW! I PROMISE!

Thank God, thanks my teachers, thanks my parents, my sister, and those who had prayed for me!!!

And next, I have a sad news though….

I heard Pastor Lia’s mother just passed away. I really very feel like visiting the funeral, but my mum don’t allow… I really want to visit ><
When you realize someone important, someone really close to you is feeling down, I really just wanna express my feelings for them ><

I really pray that Pastor Lia will go through this not too negatively, which I believe she will!!!

TOMORROW MY CCA IS ON AGAIN!! WHOO HOO!!!

I really miss cca, it makes me hang out less with Aaron, Jordan and Shing Yang.
Hahaha, I aint gay, but I love playing photoshop with my dear friends.

Everyday, I yearn to LOVE YOU MORE!!!!

2008-10-12T23:51:00.000-07:00

i am once again here to blog!!!

tomorrow is to collect my prize, or my curse... MY RESULTSSS!!!!

haha...

i seriously hope to get an A1 for my art. i am really determined!!
hmmm, maybe a B for english and maths?
i just wanna get 70% haha
S6, HERE I COME!!
i also want go art class, haha

i was making a prayer yesterday. i was telling God how much i have been feeling insecure. i was defeated by the devil yesterday, although i didnt show my insecurities, i can feel it. for some reason.
i am feeling quite stupid, cos you know the friend that has been quite disturbing to me, well, i sort of missed him these few days as he rarely calss me now, after being so distracted by his freedom of playing dota like more than 10hours a day now...

i dont know what i want, seriously, i was laughing.... haha

well, God knew what i want before i even know what i want!! haha
i was hoping to go in the same class with denzel, i tink he really needs me sometimes to tell him more about God, but right now, i just gotta let him know more friends like jordan, haha, so that he would be able to go hoGc!! AMEN!!!

did you know that i aspire to be a worshipper?? haha, seriously, i wanna sing up there!!!! HAHA!!!! :)

many people around me are SICK!
my sister:flu, samantha:flu, Shing yang: fever, My cousin:fever.

and me? i got Holy-fever. i am HIgH for Him!!
haha

2008-10-11T23:36:00.001-07:00

DENZEL RECEIVED THE LORD INTO HIS HEART!!

Thankgoodness, God and I and my friends had managed to impact his life, that it has touched denzel’s heart. I am so happy, this is the first friend I managed to get him to know God so much!! And I am so delighted that he is wlling to accept God is in his life!!

Looks like now, I have to get him planted in hoGc. Then get him to know God more, MUCH more! Haha

I hope that the people in class, would not try and persecute and stumble denzel, like how they did to me once.
I will try my best to help him, as a friend!
And I will hope that denzel will certainly be proud of God and him being a Christian! Haha.

Denzel will be strong, God will be in him, and he shall gain confidence, my my, I am getting rather excited!!!!!

Help him guys! He will certainly be a great Christian, I can see it!!!

This week, is an eventful week, GROW STRONG GUYSSS!!!!!

2008-10-11T23:25:00.001-07:00

Hey guys!! Just wanna tell you that I will be having a new blog soon, cos it is quite inconvenient for me to blog here about some secret stuff, although this blog is about to continue. I have to change the address of this blog for a certain purpose. Haha!

Thank you ; sorry.

2008-10-06T23:37:00.000-07:00

i have a GREAT feeling to blog today! cos, i have quite much thing to blog about too!! haha.

as you can see in the title, its gotta do something the words thank you and sorry.

i was wondering, why is it so that sometimes its hard to say these words, although they may seems so easy to say. although they may seems just like 1 or 2 word, it is POWERFUL and IMPACTFUL and can change ALOT of things.

i have notice somestuff. it always seems SO hard for parents to lie down their pride and say these words. i have noticed it so in my parents, that hardly whenever they did anything wrong, they hardly will lie down low and explain their wrongdoings, which sometimes really dissapoints me and irks me.

thank you. a word of gratitude.
it is easy to say, but hard to mean it.
no matter how small, or how big a person helped you, you normally show your gratitude through a small thanks.
however, if you are full of servant heartedness, you will not wanna have anythign in return if you serve, although a nice thank you really brightens your day.
i remembered always that whenever me and my sister quarrels with my parents, they will get out their ultimate weapon: "we have done so much for you and you are so unappreciative. we help you iron clothes, buy this, do that..."
my sister was saying that if they really have a servantheart, thye wouldnt mind doing this things for us.
i was thinking about it too. why would they want to be so proud of what they have done for us? do they really love us that they are williing to do this things for us? or just want us to repay? if that is so, why would they want to be so unhappy that they have served us but we didnt gave them anything back?
you may be happy of what you ahve done/accomplished, but never be arrogant/.

thats what i feel...

~~~~~~~~~

my friend, the one i mentioned at the previous post depended FARtoo much on me, until i really like pushed off my limit. he calls me 4-6 times a day normally and talks for 1/2 hr. until i really exasperated and want to hang up, he just keep clinging on and i have to just say "ok gtg BYE..." then hang up...

it sometimes get on my nerves and he just dont understand...
moreover, in times he needs my help academically, he asks me and when i cant help him, he will be most unhappy. also, when i helped him wrongly(in which i also am unsure of) he will blame me like mad and give me this kind of stupid character that irks me like mad. like when he need me, i will help, but if i accidentally made him fall, he blames me. i really am is fed-up with him sometimes ><

seriously, i just cant hold on sometimes. if he needs my help, i can if i would. but
if you would want to blame me after this, or in times where i cant help you, then why ask me for help?

also, his insecure attitudes sometimes irks me very much. but i cant blame him, i am also like this last time ><

but whatever it is, God is here to help me ^^ that is something i am happu of!

exams just two more, lit and home econ. just hoping that i acedall subjects, i hope to take art next year! ^^

byebye!

reading of God's word

2008-10-01T02:37:00.000-07:00

this day, i have just spend around 1hr or so of quiet time with my sister. i must say, this must me really quite the most happiest and joyful quiet time i had so far. dont know why, but just joy filling my heart. like God is really there and speaking to me.
my sister was teaching me the ways to read a bible, something she had just learnt in church service, it was great for her to share it with me ^^

i like the part whereby the describe the bible as a jigsaw.(not the saw horror mind you. it was really like a jigsaw.
1. as the first step to read the bible is to get the BIG picture
(understand what the new and old testament is mainly about)
2. get the edges
(read the easy parts like the gospel)
3. get it CONNECTED!
(linking the bible from the old testament to the new testamant, eg, Isaiah prophesyed that john would come!)

cool eh? i think so too!

~~~~~~~~~~

come to think of it, i had really grown, i amd so happy ^^(but cannot be arrogant!)

i wanna continue growing! my insecure feelings are like not existing in me anymore!^^
you know there is like a class outing in the hols, but my classmates dun plan to invite me(apparently they dont realy like me) but, i was not even angry, nor sad as i just took it this way, you understand what i mean? haha.
my sis told me that there will be church activites that makes me so busy that i cant even go out with my school friends and have even greater fun in church! YEAH!!! :)

but as i grow out of insecure feelings, i see people around me getting insecure feelings.
and to my friend(i dun wanna name him), i know that you are really relying on me, and you came out to be quite insecure and you really need me. but there are times whereby i cant always be with you,(but if i can i will) cos i still have to live my life and you have to live yours too, sometimes being alone, but you dont have to be, cos you can accept God and HE WILL BE WITH YOU! a 24/7 companion, come to think of it, i am rather envious, but i am not, cos i already have HIM!!! :)
(and this msg is for anyone that it may apply to you and your friend too!)

exams are still going on, my life is going on, my walk with God is STILL GOING ON!!

spread the word, spread the love guys!

new blog soon, AND EXAMS!

2008-09-27T19:39:00.000-07:00

i am going to have a new blog guys! cos i have some private stuff in which i really want to tell some ppl, but i just cant reveal it here, so have to create a private blog. i will invite some ppl, but if you wanna read, i have to consider first(if you are not one of those i want to invite)

tmr is ENGLISH PAPERS! die, i very scared. cos my paper 2 last semester fail!T.T

i am hoping that prayer can settle my heart. ^^

i give my all to God, i just hope that he can help me thorugh this exam, i cant do it alone T.T

i believe that through faith, hardwork and wisdom, i believe that i can score well. God is able!

i am hoping to aim pure physics and chemistry, if possible, art.

my mum is insisting that i study too much, dont let me study WTH!

i was hoping that DMA can do something more innovative and nice, i am hoping tt we can get the sec ones to do something even better and great, like a breakthough you see. haha

i see the revival, isee God, can you?

new post at 50%

2008-09-23T00:57:00.000-07:00

i have been trying to post but i got quite busy nowadays, EXAMS!!

yesterday did maths for around 4hrs, -.- my eyes are soo dry...

i look at "X" and "y" i going to faint...

WHY NOBODY COME AND TAG!! -.- VERY SIAN DE LEHX, LIKE MY BLOG DEAD...

i am waiting for the patch to finish to play gunz ^^

i got two more protocyber dragons and one cyber dragon for FREE!! yeah!God noes i need it, so he gave it to me^^

exam are really pushing me hard, but forward. but rmb, exams over then HOLIDAYS! just nice on my birthday we go zoo do cip, YAY ME!! ^^

denzel is a friend of mine ^^ (random)i want to get him to know God!!

my gunz patch finish ler! gtg. bye!

pictures, and yet again WHY?!

2008-09-09T01:11:00.001-07:00

well, i tink my blog looks dull without pictures, and i have been quite lazy to plug my usb to my phone and into my com...

lol

but, just a few pictures to liven things up!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

denzel really got a big misunderstanding with me

he tot i spreaded his secret that he had with a few classmates(i cant say, becos it is secretive) and he just keep scoldng me for NOTHING, even though i explained until i become so angry and exasperated.

can you understand the feeling of being maligned and wronged?

i keep telling him, but he just kept on with his idiotic ways. zz

cant care less, cant care more.

i just wanna hope this thing can go over when God handle this...

see ya...

2008-09-09T01:07:00.000-07:00

if you have been watching pure 19 and is meticulous enough to spot this, well, this is the apple drink that the female lead drank, TWICE!!

my JEANS!!! YEAH, bought it at bugis, usual price $99, but discount to $49! wow...